From the archives ← FREE KRAUT!

From the archives 151

  1. HABUO Hartlaub: forgotten Lake Merritt stadium proposal from … 1960! (via Marine Layer)
  2. KEENYUN SOSHULIZM!!1! (via Sully)
  3. ICIP whale bones for The Great Eskimo Vocabulary Hoax
  4. Bloom bait:
  5. Via andeux:

151 thoughts on “From the archives

  1. Future Ed Mar 10,2012 11:14 am

    No blackouts on mlb.tv, right?

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  2. gonealookin Mar 10,2012 11:45 am

    1. Of course there was a stadium on that site, but not that one.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Englishmajor Mar 10,2012 12:22 pm || Up

      And even in 1962:

      Oakland’s action stalls a well-organized drive by San Jose to provide the orphan American Football League team another Bay Area home.

  3. critter Mar 10,2012 12:16 pm

    We have Bartolo Colon now? I should really visit more sports websites. Perhaps ones devoted to the Oakland Athletics.

  4. Englishmajor Mar 10,2012 12:18 pm

    It’s a CESPEDTHREAD!

    • Englishmajor Mar 10,2012 12:19 pm || Up

      As he becomes a CESPEDESTRIAN to first base!

      • nevermoor Mar 10,2012 12:54 pm || Up

        Not the second time

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • gonealookin Mar 10,2012 12:25 pm || Up

      Last week Korach was pronouncing it “Yo, Anus” but he seems to have reworked the second syllable.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • danmerqury Mar 10,2012 12:26 pm || Up

        That made me laugh way harder than it should have.

      • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 10,2012 3:50 pm || Up

        I was wondering about that. Is it Yo-ennis?

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • gonealookin Mar 10,2012 4:21 pm || Up

          That’s what Ken was going with today.

          What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  5. critter Mar 10,2012 12:18 pm

    I want to tweeze his eyebrows.

  6. critter Mar 10,2012 12:19 pm

    Okay, who are all these people and why are they wearing A’s uniforms?

    • Future Ed Mar 10,2012 12:43 pm || Up

      I know, right? I really want names on the back

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • critter Mar 10,2012 1:46 pm || Up

        I also want short bios on the back. Like, “Hi, my name is Seth and this is where I came from and what the A’s gave up for me!”

        • the llama Mar 10,2012 2:07 pm || Up

          that’s a great idea.

        • Jennifer Mar 10,2012 2:08 pm || Up

          Maybe we should ask the A’s to provide essays from the players as to why we should root for them.

          • the llama Mar 10,2012 2:10 pm || Up

            “Please describe a time in your life when you had to overcome adversity.”

        • monkeyball Mar 10,2012 2:41 pm || Up

          QR codes

          you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  7. danmerqury Mar 10,2012 12:22 pm

    Bartolo Colon in green is unsettling. Manny is just bizarre.

    • critter Mar 10,2012 12:23 pm || Up

      It’s just Manny being… bizarre.

    • Jennifer Mar 10,2012 12:25 pm || Up

      These aren’t my A’s.

      • critter Mar 10,2012 12:26 pm || Up

        This is not my beautiful Coliseum.

        • the llama Mar 10,2012 2:07 pm || Up

          My god…what has Billy done?!

          • nevermoor Mar 10,2012 2:28 pm || Up

            Wolff to MLB: Let us move to SJ or we’re just going to stay in AZ.

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
            • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 10,2012 3:52 pm || Up

              Little did the D-bags suspect that they’d be the next ones hoisted on the territorial rights petard.

              "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • oblique Mar 10,2012 8:38 pm || Up

          And you may ask yourself: How did I get here?

          • Poppy Mar 10,2012 9:03 pm || Up

            Letting some trains go by, till the one that goes my way….
            Getting on the green line, through a tube under the bay…

            There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
      • danmerqury Mar 10,2012 12:28 pm || Up

        Old A
        New A
        New A
        New A
        New A

        Wow.

        • Future Ed Mar 10,2012 12:43 pm || Up

          if I had energy I would do old hat new hat comment

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Englishmajor Mar 10,2012 12:28 pm || Up

        That sure as hell is our AAMCO commercial though.

  8. danmerqury Mar 10,2012 12:29 pm

    Oh god…I did not miss those Aamco ads.

  9. critter Mar 10,2012 12:29 pm

    Ah, the Aamco commercials. It’s like coming home.
    and finding a really annoying commercial on the t.v.

  10. bear88 Mar 10,2012 12:43 pm

    I don’t hate Fosse, but haven’t really missed his tiresome cheerleading about dumb stuff. Colon is “fun to watch” because he’s not bothered by anything, such as crappy defense. Well, maybe that’s because it’s spring training and it doesn’t count.

    Donaldson looks like an adventure at third, although it was good that he caught Suzuki’s airmailed throw to third.

    Cespedes’ first at-bat is a walk? Didn’t expect that.

    • gonealookin Mar 10,2012 1:06 pm || Up

      I was at spring training the year of the Mark McGwire at third base experiment (they wanted to move Carney Lansford over to first). It was horrifying.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • andeux Mar 10,2012 1:22 pm || Up

      Yeah, given that one of the concerns about Cespedes is that he’ll be Mr. swing at fking everything, I’m taking the walk as a very good sign.

      TINSTAAFK
      • dmoas Mar 10,2012 4:14 pm || Up

        In the two ABs I saw, he didn’t look over anxious and swing happy at all. And the third one I missed went over a wall or something.

        • nevermoor Mar 10,2012 4:17 pm || Up

          Yeah, taking a walk on a full count in your first “MLB” at bat is kind of impressive in its own right.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • Poppy Mar 10,2012 4:25 pm || Up

      I’m rooting for Donaldson. I have no idea whether or not he “sucks” and I don’t care. I just like that he’s been in our system for a long time without anyone going “I can’t wait until we can see Donaldson!”

      And in related news, I tried really hard to find something unlikeable about Jemile Weeks during his interview today, and I still can’t. So I give up, as I (and anyone who knows me well) knew I eventually would. He still needs to improve his D by about 38,000% before I call him “fun,” though.

      There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
  11. bear88 Mar 10,2012 12:51 pm

    Cespedes with his first hit – a sharp ground ball up the middle. (It drove in a run too.)

    • nevermoor Mar 10,2012 12:56 pm || Up

      Yeah, that was pretty. Irrational optimism… GO!

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • nevermoor Mar 10,2012 2:29 pm || Up

        And irrational optimism FULLY engaged after he crushed that one. 162-0 here we come!

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  12. Englishmajor Mar 10,2012 1:26 pm

    Okay, I’m convinced.

    • rubesandbabes Mar 10,2012 1:28 pm || Up

      He’s the best guy on the team.

      No Badges For This Game
    • 5Aces Mar 10,2012 4:25 pm || Up

      I think I found the name for the back of the jersey. Have we heard where he stands on gold alts yet?

      Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
  13. bear88 Mar 10,2012 1:28 pm

    Cespedes with a rifle shot down the left field line for an easy home run. It sailed far over the fence.

    I think I’ve changed my mind about the A’s best prospect.

    • the dogfather Mar 10,2012 8:17 pm || Up

      That was a thing of beauty — complete no-doubter off the bat. He moves very easily in center field, as well.

      The meaning of life is not so much found, as it is Made. -- Opus
  14. stranahanahan Mar 10,2012 1:42 pm

    So I think Cespedes just convinced me to buy mlb.tv this year.

    • critter Mar 10,2012 1:44 pm || Up

      Is it too early to reserve my WS tickets?

      • SPWC Mar 10,2012 3:46 pm || Up

        I’m sure there are plenty of fine seats available for when Robin Ventura’s boys come to town… no need to reserve.

        \"Weren\'t you already aware the Kay is already writing everyone\'s story? We\'re all just characters who believe we are real. Things make more sense now, don\'t they. Be honest.\"- DMOAS
    • DFA Mar 10,2012 2:01 pm || Up

      Its why I bought season tickets again.

      In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
  15. critter Mar 10,2012 1:49 pm

    Stupid comcast. Last month they swapped out a box. The csr told me there would be no charge. When the tech showed up he said there would be no charge. So of course they charged me.

    • nevermoor Mar 10,2012 2:29 pm || Up

      Call ’em and tell them you’re pretty sure DTV wouldn’t charge for that.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • critter Mar 10,2012 2:43 pm || Up

        Thinking of switching to D* anyway now that I don’t live in the woods.

  16. critter Mar 10,2012 2:11 pm

    “I’ve done it too, check the track record, Fosse.” I love Jemile.

  17. rubesandbabes Mar 10,2012 2:14 pm

    Taylor in Left, Choice in Center, and Cowgill in Right (having moved over from Center).

    No Badges For This Game
    • Jennifer Mar 10,2012 2:20 pm || Up

      I think the Bleacher people should invite Michael Choice’s mother to hang. She could have a banner that read “Pro Choice,” which would be awesome on a shit ton of levels.

      • rubesandbabes Mar 10,2012 2:25 pm || Up

        Would work even better if she wasn’t an Evangelical from Texas…

        (joking joking)

        No Badges For This Game
      • monkeyball Mar 10,2012 2:50 pm || Up

        Her estranged sister could have one that read Auntie Choice

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 10,2012 3:55 pm || Up

          And the families of his rivals could respond with “He’s a Child not a Choice” banners.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  18. monkeyball Mar 10,2012 3:03 pm

    Was that TDF in the Chavez jersey?

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • batgirl Mar 10,2012 5:49 pm || Up

      That’s what I thought.

    • the dogfather Mar 10,2012 8:20 pm || Up

      No Chavez jersey — just a black longsleeve tee. First base side.

      The meaning of life is not so much found, as it is Made. -- Opus
  19. Glorious Mundy Mar 10,2012 3:05 pm

    Aw, hell. Now I’m excited about the season.

  20. nobody in particular Mar 10,2012 3:08 pm

    The best thing would be if the Cespedes-led A’s somehow host the new Wild Card play-in game at the Coliseum and Selig has to field question after question about why no new yard for the A’s.

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
    • SPWC Mar 10,2012 3:47 pm || Up

      that would be super cool.

      The only thing cooler would be if someone adopted “The Moving Finger” as their intro song…

      \"Weren\'t you already aware the Kay is already writing everyone\'s story? We\'re all just characters who believe we are real. Things make more sense now, don\'t they. Be honest.\"- DMOAS
  21. Future Ed Mar 10,2012 4:07 pm

    Oh dusty

    “I talked to a couple of Cuban friends I have in Miami, and they told me he was a pretty good ballplayer,” Reds manager Dusty Baker said. “I’m surprised the A’s signed him.”

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Glorious Mundy Mar 10,2012 5:16 pm || Up

      Go choke on a toothpick, you child-endangering incompetent.

      • Poppy Mar 10,2012 6:08 pm || Up

        He wasn’t child-endangering, he was JT-additional-hotness-enabling.

        There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
        • monkeyball Mar 10,2012 6:16 pm || Up

          That was one of the greatest/weirdest things to ever happen in a baseball game

          you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
          • the llama Mar 10,2012 6:48 pm || Up

            Yeah, I’m surprised that it is not generally considered one of “baseball’s great moments.” It’s even better than Rick Monday.

            • Poppy Mar 10,2012 6:48 pm || Up

              And yet I can’t find it on YouTube.

              There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
        • Kylianna Mar 10,2012 7:02 pm || Up

          I still don’t understand why the Giants had that crappy, looks-like-it-was-made-by-film-students-editing-in-a-basement advertising next year, when they could have just shown that clip and had throngs of women (and a mix of men) tearing down the walls to get into the park.

          JT Snow = Sexy Superhero.

  22. Poppy Mar 10,2012 4:08 pm

    4. aaaaaaaaawww… but it led me to this:

    AAAAAAAAAAWWW!!!

    There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
  23. Poppy Mar 10,2012 4:51 pm

    I rarely, rarely look at job listings any more because let’s just say “the window has closed.” I’m going to do my 30 hrs/wk in benefits administration until I leave the area, whenever that is. But occasionally I will look at listings just out of curiosity… and I swear, every time I look at craigslist (rarely), this ad is among the most recent postings. [edited to correct the link]

    There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 10,2012 6:14 pm || Up

      :(

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Poppy Mar 10,2012 6:33 pm || Up

        Don’t be sad if you can’t speak/write Greek… it happens to a lot of people…

        There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
    • gonealookin Mar 10,2012 6:39 pm || Up

      Ulysses Press has an odd mix of offerings; the “Dirty Slang” series and right next to it that ultra-right wing “Survive the Apocalypse” stuff.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  24. Kylianna Mar 10,2012 5:17 pm

    Cespedes? MOAR LIKE SEXPEDES.

    I am pleased by his existence.

    • the llama Mar 10,2012 5:52 pm || Up

      Sexpedes is a great erotoentomological nickname.

  25. monkeyball Mar 10,2012 6:10 pm
    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 10,2012 6:18 pm || Up

      Every card counter I’ve talked to (which is a lot) believes him/herself to be David to the casino’s Goliath. Every card counter believes he/she’s “taking money from an evil enterprise.” The Christian part of this group doesn’t really seem any more relevant than if the founders met an the Elks Club, or at MIT.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  26. monkeyball Mar 10,2012 6:23 pm

    Nerd plus ultra:

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • Poppy Mar 10,2012 6:31 pm || Up

      That’s awesome, but WTF???

      There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
    • the llama Mar 10,2012 7:31 pm || Up

      Trying too hard. In Portland, of course.

      • monkeyball Mar 10,2012 7:32 pm || Up

        Sure, he’s trying too hard. But he’s succeeding.

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
        • the llama Mar 10,2012 7:35 pm || Up

          This reminds me of a girl I knew who went to Oregon State. In an attempt to inject some weirdness to the west coast campus most closely approximating a conservative rural ag school, she went over-the-top wiccan. Way over the top. Obnoxiously over the top.

          She got into Berkeley for grad school, and from later accounts she was horrified to find that she was…normal.

          • wistful witch Mar 11,2012 4:08 am || Up

            please describe “over-the-top wiccan.”

            • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 11,2012 8:35 am || Up

              Cowgill.

              "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
            • the llama Mar 11,2012 9:30 am || Up

              Equivalent of evangelical Christian shoving a bible on you.

      • PDXAthleticsfan Mar 13,2012 9:57 am || Up

        Yeah, I think I’ve seen him around. And, yes, we have plenty of people who go out of their way to be weird. So the FK what? It’s fun.

        A soliloquy of fresh-sounding ideas which would probably be disastrous.
  27. the llama Mar 10,2012 7:41 pm
    • Future Ed Mar 10,2012 8:09 pm || Up

      “What is DFAs most common pick up line?

      Famous quotes for $400.”

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Buck Turgidson Mar 10,2012 8:59 pm || Up

      How fortunate we are that the finest writer at the Chronicle covers the A’s. Ok I’m biased but seriously, right?

      -A night you wouldn't conjure in your wildest alcoholic dream!
  28. Future Ed Mar 10,2012 7:54 pm
    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  29. the llama Mar 10,2012 9:16 pm

    My alma mater, in the NCAA Men’s Final Four for the first time!

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 10,2012 10:01 pm || Up

      The name “Engineers” I get. But that is one pissed-off beaver:

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • the llama Mar 10,2012 10:22 pm || Up

        Don’t FK with TIM the Beaver.

        • PDXAthleticsfan Mar 15,2012 10:10 am || Up

          Sal, do you know if there is any non-streaming way to watch the game? Cow-irkers brother is the coach of Whitewater and was hoping to watch.

          A soliloquy of fresh-sounding ideas which would probably be disastrous.
          • the llama Mar 16,2012 9:33 pm || Up

            I had heard that NCAA was going to stream the game (http://www.ncaa.com/liveschedule/2012/03/16), but by the time I got home tonight it was too late.

      • the llama Mar 10,2012 10:22 pm || Up

        But that is one pissed-off beaver

        TWHS

    • Jennifer Mar 11,2012 9:43 am || Up

      Your llama mater.

  30. Ice Cream Mar 11,2012 10:10 am
    Where is the good in "good-bye"?
  31. Future Ed Mar 11,2012 12:18 pm

    SO the game is not on. Stupid arizona

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • SPWC Mar 11,2012 12:39 pm || Up

      The Cubs are on WGN.

      \"Weren\'t you already aware the Kay is already writing everyone\'s story? We\'re all just characters who believe we are real. Things make more sense now, don\'t they. Be honest.\"- DMOAS
  32. FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 11,2012 1:01 pm

    Goddammit. Fuck FSU.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  33. Future Ed Mar 11,2012 1:18 pm

    Jemile has almost warning track power

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • brian.only Mar 11,2012 2:21 pm || Up

      I’m excited for him this year, seemed like he developed a bit of power in the fall last season.

  34. Englishmajor Mar 11,2012 3:53 pm

    For those of you not listening to Ken and Ray today:

    Ray tells a story about Adam Piatt asking his wife to look at the spring training schedule and verify what stadium the next day’s game was at. Mrs. Piatt looked and said “Oh, that’s fun! It’s going to be a surprise ballpark!”

    Ken countered with a tale of his high school basketball team and the player who showed up for their game against Bye (or maybe he thought it was B.Y.E.).

  35. Englishmajor Mar 11,2012 4:01 pm

    BEHOLD
    THE
    POWER
    OF
    KEEBS!

    • brian.only Mar 11,2012 4:02 pm || Up

      So good, sounds like we’ll get some FDLS

    • Englishmajor Mar 11,2012 4:07 pm || Up

      And this is the second game in a row where an inning that features a great Sogard moment is immediately followed by the ad about Santa’s helpers in the offseason that starts out “What up, my elf!”. I would suspect someone at 95.7 of knowing our nickname for Eric, except they only have about five commercials to choose from, so it probably is random.

      • brian.only Mar 11,2012 4:09 pm || Up

        I hadn’t even noticed that!
        You think Eautino was getting squeezed the first AB?

  36. andeux Mar 11,2012 4:01 pm

    Kz error helps set up a Sogard bases-clearing double.

    TINSTAAFK
  37. doctorK Mar 11,2012 4:03 pm

    NCAA to Pac-12: You suck.
    Colorado – 11th seed
    Berkeley – 12th, play-in game
    Everybody else – enjoy the NIT

    • the llama Mar 11,2012 4:10 pm || Up

      Except MIT.

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 11,2012 4:53 pm || Up

      The Pac 12 does suck this year. You could make the case that UW should have Cal’s spot, but no way both of them deserve to be in, once Colorado stole the automatic bid.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • gonealookin Mar 11,2012 8:41 pm || Up

        Cal: RPI 38, 9-7 vs. top 100 RPI
        Wash: RPI 71, 4-8 vs. top 100.

        Hell, Northwestern’s RPI was 63. So that wasn’t really close. With Cal and BYU both in play-in games we do have some FK interest in the play-ins. The Pacific time zone is pretty sorry though; you’re hoping to get one Sweet Sixteen out of UNLV (6), SDSU (6), Saint Mary’s (7) and Gonzaga (7).

        What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Mar 11,2012 8:51 pm || Up

          Oh, I agree Cal was the choice over UW. It’s more a comment on how bad the Pac 12 was, that its regular season champ got left out.

          Of the teams you cite, I’d say UNLV is the strongest, but I don’t see them getting past Baylor. SDSU’s probably the best Sweet Sixteen shot. And Kansas can be beat, so maybe St Mary’s could do something shocking.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  38. brian.only Mar 11,2012 4:12 pm

    Kouz for the game, do it.

    • brian.only Mar 11,2012 4:15 pm || Up

      Nail biter.

    • the llama Mar 11,2012 4:15 pm || Up

      Yeah, Kouz just being Kouz.

      • brian.only Mar 11,2012 4:21 pm || Up

        Pretty shaky outing for FDLS, two passed balls doesn’t inspire much confidence, then again not too sure how defensively endowed Norris is either.
        Poor showing of communication when you meet at the mound and then a wild pitch follows.

  39. Englishmajor Mar 11,2012 4:16 pm

    Ceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelebrate good times, come on!

    • brian.only Mar 11,2012 4:17 pm || Up

      Getting pretty excited for opening day!

  40. andeux Mar 11,2012 4:46 pm
    TINSTAAFK
    • nevermoor Mar 11,2012 5:54 pm || Up

      Surprised Choice doesn’t get to stick around longer.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • danny Mar 11,2012 6:29 pm || Up

      Anyone know if any of the NRIs have opt-out clauses if they aren’t put on the 40-man roster by a certain date?

  41. nevermoor Mar 11,2012 7:38 pm
    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  42. the llama Mar 11,2012 10:07 pm

    I think emo kids are as annoying the as the next guy, but this…

    • SPWC Mar 12,2012 8:31 am || Up

      I wish I had a private army with drones and mini-nukes to defend all the freaks of the world (and harass regular Syrian army units in our off time)

      \"Weren\'t you already aware the Kay is already writing everyone\'s story? We\'re all just characters who believe we are real. Things make more sense now, don\'t they. Be honest.\"- DMOAS

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