I’m a blogger-slash-copywriter ← FREE KRAUT!

I’m a blogger-slash-copywriter 77

I filed my Thanksgiving time off request a month ago. I don’t see any similar paperwork from any of you slackers.

Eventful week so far: Saturday rental-car nightmare (we’d decided to ditch the northern trip already, so when the right rear tire was at 20 psi and the driver’s seat started falling apart, I was quite happy to not be going over the Siskiyou pass), Sunday daytrip up to Healdsburg (trip here for dinner was nice — their homemade bangers were excellent, the Hop Rod was nigh undrinkable, the Big Black Bear Stout was … ok, but the Ryevalry was excellent), Monday daytrip down to the aquarium in Monterey, big shopping day yesterday with JP, and a trip today down to Fresno to visit relatives for Thanksgiving. Trying to get a batch of banana bread done and some stuffing to take, then hitting the road with a towel full of homemade breakfast burritos.

Only link for you lazy slugs: Berkman doesn’t want to DH.

“I’m not a DH-slash-first baseman,” Berkman told Rosenthal. “I’m a first baseman-slash-outfielder.”

OK, one more: Jean Quan isn’t a mayor-elect-slash-ballpark-booster, she’s a mayor-elect-slash-scofflaw.

77 thoughts on “I’m a blogger-slash-copywriter

  1. nevermoor Nov 24,2010 11:06 am

    I’ve only ever been to Healdsburg to play football.

    their homemade bangers were excellent

    …too easy

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  2. andeux Nov 24,2010 11:47 am

    Yesterday was the deadline to offer free agents arbitration.
    Not surprisingly, Crawford, Werth, and Beltre were all offered arbitration, so signing them would cost a draft pick (2nd rounder for the A’s since our first-round pick is protected).

    Of the potential DH signings, Dunn and Konerko would also cost a pick.
    Berkman, Vlad, Matsui, Magglio Ordonez, Carlos Pena, Manny were not offered arbitration.
    Thome was not ranked, but reportedly the Twins are interesting in re-signing him.

    TINSTAAFK
    • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 12:35 pm || Up

      How does it work if we sign two of these? Do we also lose a 3rd?

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • andeux Nov 24,2010 12:51 pm || Up

        Yes. Not that that will ever happen, of course.

        TINSTAAFK
        • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 12:54 pm || Up

          Right, just wasn’t sure on the rules.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  3. nevermoor Nov 24,2010 12:35 pm
    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  4. nevermoor Nov 24,2010 12:37 pm

    This seems right to me:

    Green Zone is a re-imagining of the first days of the post-victory occupation of Iraq. And it really doesn’t “undermine our troops.” . . . The undisputed hero of the film is a soldier who’s defending the lives and missions of his men against bureaucrats and journalists who put them in danger.

    Do you less-liberal FKers see that movie as anti-war?

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • JediLeroy Nov 24,2010 5:38 pm || Up

      Haven’t seen it, but most reviews I read seemed to agree with you and the blurb.

      I can see how the “invasion was based on misinformation/lies, therefore the war is pointless” angle could be seen as anti-war. But it’s really more anti-administration than anything, from the sounds of it.

      People like Palin are, in my mind, right for being grateful for what good soldiers do to make life safe for others (I’m not feeling up to debating whether that’s always the case). Where she errs, however, is in saying that any criticism of war or the motives behind war are essentially critical of the soldiers themselves.

      az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
      • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 5:59 pm || Up

        I agree with “being grateful for what good soldiers do to make life safe for others.” In my mind, this movie is a depiction of that, with “government” types getting in his way. I’m actually a bit surprised she doesn’t praise it as pro-conservative.

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
        • JediLeroy Nov 24,2010 6:18 pm || Up

          Some uber-conservatives feel that any second-guessing of the war is inherently critical of the soldiers, since it delegitimizes them. A rational person can see that criticism of the administration does not equal criticism of the troops. Reviews I read when it came out talked about an apparent reverence for the troops in spite of the questionable intelligence that led to the occupation. My money’s on her having not actually seen the movie.

          az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
          • ptbnl Nov 24,2010 6:33 pm || Up

            I’m guessing she watched it with her old ally, Kim Jong-Il.

            If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  5. nevermoor Nov 24,2010 12:41 pm

    K-Thug, validated (maybe).

    In a nutshell, Ireland has been orthodox and responsible — guaranteeing all debts, engaging in savage austerity to try to pay for the cost of those guarantees, and, of course, staying on the euro. Iceland has been heterodox: capital controls, large devaluation, and a lot of debt restructuring — notice that wonderful line from the IMF, above, about how “private sector bankruptcies have led to a marked decline in external debt”. Bankrupting yourself to recovery! Seriously.

    And guess what: heterodoxy is working a whole lot better than orthodoxy.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  6. elcroata Nov 24,2010 2:30 pm

    Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I know I’m a day early but it is almost midnight here. Enjoy the turkey.

    Because survival is insufficient
    • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 3:04 pm || Up

      iFSU, the turkey enjoys YOU!

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • elcroata Nov 24,2010 10:49 pm || Up

        Haven’t realized till now that FSU = FreeSeatUpgrade = Former Soviet Union. Coincidence?

        Because survival is insufficient
        • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 10:59 pm || Up

          You’d have to ask him.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
        • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 8:12 am || Up

          Yes, coincidence. I also despise Florida State University.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
          • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 8:17 am || Up

            hey, I drove through Tallahassee on my way here and will drive through again on my way back. I’ll spit out the window for you.

    • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 3:04 pm || Up

      And thanks, good work on the bunting analysis.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • elcroata Nov 24,2010 10:54 pm || Up

        Thank you. It’s been a fun series to do, but I think now is the time for a little break again.

        Because survival is insufficient
  7. andeux Nov 24,2010 6:12 pm

    Minor League Transactions

    Oakland Athletics
    Signed: RHP Anthony Lerew, 3B Adam Heether (re-signed), 3B Wes Timmons

    Notes that Lerew has been bad in his brief time in the majors, but has been stellar in the Venezuelan winter league, including a no-hitter.
    Timmons has been at AAA for 5 years, without seeing the majors – he has a career .387 OBP in the minors, but not much power.

    TINSTAAFK
    • lenscrafters Nov 24,2010 6:38 pm || Up

      Well at least we managed to sign one 31 year old third baseman thus far…

  8. mother pucker Nov 24,2010 7:51 pm

    This really, really sucks.

    I’ll blame Comcast, because it’s easier and my experience with them in the past has been worse.

    • nevermoor Nov 24,2010 10:01 pm || Up

      I bet DirecTV would back up the bargain truck if you called and said you were thinking about switching from Dish.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • oblique Nov 25,2010 10:30 am || Up

      This is Dish’s response. And yes, this does really really suck.

    • Soaker Nov 25,2010 11:23 am || Up

      It does seem like more of these carriage issues arise when it’s Comcast that owns the rights to the programming. Ask the fans of the NBA Blazers up in the Portland area about that; if you don’t have Comcast Cable you haven’t been able to watch the Blazers for several years now. The only time I’ve been directly affected was last year when Comcast and DirecTV got into a pissing match over carriage of Versus (which is owned by Comcast), so I missed a couple of Cal football games that were shown on Versus.

      So I still have CSN California, for now. I’ve concluded, though, that if I’m blacked out of programming I want to watch due to one of these disputes, then my response needs to be to reduce my desire to watch that programming to zero and do other things with my time. At some point that may result in my not seeing A’s games for two weeks, two months or two years. Of course, the question then would be whether my desire to see A’s games on television would ever return. My Coliseum attendance, which was several games per homestand up until the summer of 1994, crashed after the 94-95 work stoppage and never recovered to a level of more than several games per year afterward.

      Treacherous chasms of half-truth and despair. -- Ken Korach
  9. andeux Nov 25,2010 8:41 am

    I am thankful for FREE KRAUT!

    TINSTAAFK
    • nanotrebuchet Nov 25,2010 8:51 am || Up

      Hear hear!

    • nevermoor Nov 25,2010 8:59 am || Up

      I am thankful for the effort MB puts into it.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • batgirl Nov 25,2010 10:29 am || Up

      Me too! Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

      …off to try and get my dad excited about vegan pot pie for dinner…

    • oblique Nov 25,2010 10:33 am || Up

      Seconded! Happy Thanksgiving, all!

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Nov 28,2010 8:11 am || Up

      Except that I heard TINSTAAFK. Still, praise be to fermentation in all its glory!

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  10. mjdittmer Nov 25,2010 9:14 pm

    Long time, no kraut! Happy Thanksgiving, all. I’m thankful for your humor here; I still enjoy it whenever I get a chance.

  11. linusalf Nov 26,2010 4:27 pm

    FSU need to talk to ya..

    email me…. linusalf(at)yahoo(dot)com

  12. nevermoor Nov 26,2010 10:42 pm

    We excel at baseball:

    Top six winning percentages with leads entering the ninth inning:
    1. Tampa Bay .988 (81-1)
    2. San Diego .987 (77-1)
    3. St. Louis .987 (74-1)
    4. Oakland .986 (73-1)
    5. Detroit .986 (70-1)
    6. Kansas City .981 (53-1)

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  13. Poppy Nov 27,2010 11:08 am

    What a bunch of babies. I see raccoons at close range just about every night, and all joking aside, they actually do scare me — but I certainly wouldn’t want them shot or even “removed.” They’re just doing their thing. Avoid them. If they get into your garbage can, secure it better or clean up the mess you enabled them to make. Accept the fact that if you want to live in the burbs instead of surrounded by city concrete, you have given an assortment of local animals nowhere else to live/forage/hunt but with you in your neighborhood.

    There's a wild thing in the woolshed and it's keeping me awake at night.
    • Leopold Bloom Nov 27,2010 7:47 pm || Up

      Poor little raccoons…

    • ptbnl Nov 27,2010 7:47 pm || Up

      I wonder if she does out-calls?

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
      • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 8:18 am || Up

        Every time we post that, I think, “What a lovely blazer that is!”

    • monkeyball Nov 28,2010 8:28 am || Up

      Plenty of raccoons (and possums) in concrete SF.

      you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  14. ptbnl Nov 27,2010 7:52 pm

    Roger Penrose claims he has found patterns in the cosmic microwave background left by supermassive black hole collisions in a pre-Big Bang aeon.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • nevermoor Nov 27,2010 9:02 pm || Up

      Nerd

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • ptbnl Nov 27,2010 11:01 pm || Up

        If he’s right (which is extraordinarily unlikely), then everything else is wrong.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • nevermoor Nov 27,2010 11:22 pm || Up

          See, that’s what I needed.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • nanotrebuchet Nov 28,2010 9:29 am || Up

      Would a non-superstar scientist make that claim, provided the same data? (Serious question)

      • ptbnl Nov 28,2010 10:08 am || Up

        In cosmology, certainly. The chance of anyone spending any time considering the veracity (or even just the plausibility) of the claims is directly proportional to the status of the author though.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  15. monkeyball Nov 28,2010 8:15 am

    This is interesting, but (a) I don’t know that there are direct conclusions that can be applied to our Bay Area, and (/because of) (b) the methodology of this is not what I’d call comprehensive.

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 8:29 am || Up

      Wait, we don’t rank in the bottom of corporate sponsors? But we’ve only got a nebulous $500k promise from Clorox!

      I just had a conversation with a guy from Philly yesterday about the Rays. Part of it is definitely where they play, the Trop, but the other part is the population here, even more so than California or even Arizona, is not from here. They’ve come with their own allegiances from Chicago and Cleveland and especially New York and Boston. The local team was only ever meant–only ever marketed–as a place where these people can see their team when they come to town; it was never marketed as a place to root for the stick figures the “away” teams play.

      In one sense, this is smart marketing. The whole point of having a team here, from the Yankees perspective, is to have a place to see the Yankees games 10 times a year, to see the Red Sox come to town 10 times a year. The downside is you don’t build any continuity. There is no fan base–only jackholes who wanna come see the Yankees play the Washington Generals. When the Yankees play here, it is very like a Yankees home game. Not like when they come to the Coliseum. There are a lot of transplants and fair weathers that show up at the Coliseum–it’s annoying, for sure. But it’s a different scene here. The Rays are clearly the visitors here when the Yankees come to town, and that has to be ust a dagger in the heart of any Rays player.

      • monkeyball Nov 28,2010 8:33 am || Up

        So I can count you among the supporters of my theory that MLB is going to eliminate the A’s and Rays?

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
        • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 9:25 am || Up

          If that happens, mb, who do we switch to?

          • monkeyball Nov 28,2010 12:21 pm || Up

            Whichever team Cust is on.

            you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
            • nevermoor Nov 28,2010 4:12 pm || Up

              The SurfDawgs?

              "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
              • monkeyball Nov 28,2010 9:31 pm || Up

                {searches MCC for dead horse ani gif}

                you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
        • Soaker Nov 28,2010 10:03 am || Up

          Your contraction theory makes more sense than moving either of the teams to Las Vegas, which shares most of the issues relating to the Tampa Bay area described in the article plus the one mentioned by LB above.

          Treacherous chasms of half-truth and despair. -- Ken Korach
      • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 10:12 am || Up

        I also think there’s a general sense of “get the fuck out of our stadium” when the Yankees/Red Sox invade the Coliseum–there’s not many of us, but we are quite rabid and not entirely safe/stable. I think most of the visiting fans sense that and are aware of it. That is not the case in St. Pete.

  16. monkeyball Nov 28,2010 8:21 am

    So, if we date the A’s development of a San Jose stadium from the beginning of their efforts, it’s already built! (The alternate conclusion from the SJ move is that a stadium in Oakland will be completed on an infinite timeline.)

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  17. Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 9:34 am

    Also, isn’t he legally required to not make these jokes any longer? I thought the terms of the divorce clearly stated…

    • monkeyball Nov 28,2010 5:57 pm || Up

      I thought we got you for weekends and holidays.

      you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
      • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 9:34 pm || Up

        You do. And for Breaking Bad season.

  18. monkeyball Nov 28,2010 5:56 pm

    Ahhh, interesting — remember that “just PR” quote from Iwakuma’s agent regarding the alleged offer to Beltre? I guess we didn’t consider the possibility that he was referring to Boras, not Beane.

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • nevermoor Nov 28,2010 9:07 pm || Up

      Yeah. Odd thing to make up though.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  19. monkeyball Nov 28,2010 7:22 pm
    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  20. monkeyball Nov 28,2010 7:23 pm

    leslie Nielsen is a … ok, won’t go there. He’s dead.

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  21. nevermoor Nov 28,2010 9:19 pm

    Wow:

    I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO…less than a minute ago via Twitter for iPad

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • Leopold Bloom Nov 28,2010 9:37 pm || Up

      “Yeah, we were in the game, til Jesus made me fumble.”

      • andeux Nov 29,2010 10:27 am || Up

        It wasn’t a fumble, it was a dropped touchdown pass. In overtime.

        TINSTAAFK
        • Leopold Bloom Nov 29,2010 10:53 am || Up

          I know. At the risk of having Lookout Landing header thrown at me, he was starting on my fantasy team.

        • nanotrebuchet Nov 29,2010 12:40 pm || Up

          Super Bowls XXV-XXVIII
          Music City Miracle
          Dropped touchdown pass in OT

          I think there’s a credible case that God hates the Bills.

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Nov 28,2010 9:42 pm || Up

      Refreshing. I’m still hoping for the day when a victorious athlete starts his post-game interview with “I’d just like to say that all glory goes to Satan, the Prince of Darkness…”

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • nevermoor Nov 29,2010 9:45 am || Up

        Should have been an XFL player gimmick.

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • ptbnl Nov 29,2010 9:51 am || Up

      Like all wise beings, God hates (American) football.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • andeux Nov 29,2010 10:27 am || Up

      That’s awesome. It’s hard for me to stay mad at Stevie Johnson.

      TINSTAAFK
      • nevermoor Nov 29,2010 10:28 am || Up

        My favorite part is the “THX THO…”

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"

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