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Vain Books, profane Ballads, and filthy Songs 72

27 Jun 2011  |  monkeyball  |The Grill
  1. More than 100 googol sperm are missing
  2. What Jon Cole said. Someone should give him his own blog.
  3. nm pr0n bait: Inside Nancy Pelosi …
  4. I’m no fan of Christie, but I really don’t see anything at all wrong with what he said here
  5. WTF? I’m totally with ML on this one.
  6. I want to see the bankruptcy court award ownership of the Dodgers to … Manny!
  7. Amen, brother Thomas:

    parents’ primary task was to suppress their children’s natural depravity

72 thoughts on “Vain Books, profane Ballads, and filthy Songs”

  1. monkeyball Jun 27,2011 10:39 am
    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:10 am || Up

      Not far enough. Historical preservation is, in and of itself, a questionable goal.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • andeux Jun 27,2011 11:15 am || Up

      The exact same thing – people fighting to stop the replacement of a branch library on the grounds that it is an example of “mid-century modern” architecture – is happening in Berkeley. I think King is being too generous in ascribing motives other than cynical obstructionism to the extreme wing of the historic preservationist movement.

      TINSTAAFK
      • andeux Jun 27,2011 11:20 am || Up

        And to bring this on topic, I wonder if the Coliseum is also considered an example of mid-century modern architecture.

        TINSTAAFK
        • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 11:22 am || Up

          It’d make a nice library.

          you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
          • Ice Cream Jun 27,2011 1:55 pm || Up

            Christ, what an athenaeum

            Where is the good in "good-bye"?
      • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 11:26 am || Up

        I’d guess that the proportion of cynicism is somewhat lower in the EWotHPM than it is in, say, the Congressional GOP. But not by much.

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
        • andeux Jun 27,2011 11:32 am || Up

          Plus they’re remarkably consistent. (ObAtLeastIt’sAnEthos)

          TINSTAAFK
  2. nevermoor Jun 27,2011 10:53 am

    1: MY can have some really good posts.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:26 am || Up

      Speaking of.

      Bully pulpit!!!

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 11:27 am || Up
        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
      • andeux Jun 27,2011 11:43 am || Up

        The meeting with high-dollar pro-equality Republican donors would seem not savvy, but naive and weak.

        Isn’t the key difference here not the threshold needed for passing the bill, but that he actually managed to get some Republican votes to move past that threshold?

        TINSTAAFK
        • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:56 am || Up

          I dunno. Obama got Ben Nelson and Joe Liebermann, for example.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  3. nevermoor Jun 27,2011 10:54 am

    2: NONONO, Obamao is a total failure and basically a hard-line conservative who specifically hates gays because he needs to use to BULLY PULPIT to force through the policies he wants. This bill represents a failure of leadership!!!

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  4. nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:03 am

    3: My position on Pelosi is clear. She’s not a saint, but she’s the best politician in Congress and it makes me tingly in all the right places to vote for her.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 11:10 am || Up

      Most … resist … temptation … to edit … preposition …

      you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  5. nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:09 am

    7: For fuck’s sake. No wonder he doesn’t ever talk.

    I get, but strongly disagree with, the “violent video games teach violence” argument. But if I was defending the law I wouldn’t want that asshole on my team.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  6. nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:27 am

    Bigoted anti-mormon sentiment: dickish.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 8:37 pm || Up

      Is this Republicans only, or both parties?

      • JediLeroy Jun 27,2011 10:23 pm || Up

        The new Gallup poll, conducted June 9-12, finds nearly 20% of Republicans and independents saying they would not support a Mormon for president. That is slightly lower than the 27% of Democrats saying the same.

        From here

        az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
        • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 10:33 pm || Up

          I’m just commenting on the shape of the graph, but that suggests the numbers are total.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
          • JediLeroy Jun 27,2011 10:40 pm || Up

            Oh. Wow. Didn’t even see that.

            az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
            • suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 10:59 pm || Up

              OK, I’m seeing it now. Totally killed that joke.

              • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 28,2011 12:22 am || Up

                Yeah, it’s dead now, but by 2019 that joke’s gonna explode! Also, anti-Mormon electoral bigotry will be pervasive.

                "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • the dogfather Jun 28,2011 6:13 am || Up

      ?

      The meaning of life is not so much found, as it is Made. -- Opus
    • the dogfather Jun 28,2011 6:37 am || Up

      Hell* — Thomas Jefferson couldn’t win the Republican nomination today:

      He may have written the Declaration of Independence, but were he around today Thomas Jefferson wouldn’t have a prayer of winning the Republican nomination, much less the presidency. It wouldn’t be his liaison with the teenage daughter of one of his slaves nor the love children she bore him that would be the stumbling block. Nor would it be Jefferson’s suspicious possession of an English translation of the Quran that might doom him to fail the Newt Gingrich loyalty test. No, it would be the Jesus problem that would do him in. For Thomas Jefferson denied that Jesus was the son of God. Worse, he refused to believe that Jesus ever made any claim that he was. While he was at it, Jefferson also rejected as self-evidently absurd the Trinity, the Virgin Birth, and the Resurrection.

      * and by Hell, I mean Newsweek. I was duped into a deeply discounted subscription. It’s just awful (current breathless cover story: if Diana were alive today, at 50…)

      The meaning of life is not so much found, as it is Made. -- Opus
      • suspicious coin Jun 28,2011 7:02 am || Up

        He’d never win the democratic primary, either.

      • nevermoor Jun 28,2011 9:31 am || Up

        Also too: Ronald Regan

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
        • Leopold Bloom Jun 28,2011 9:44 am || Up

          No, I think Reagan would handily win the Democratic nod.

  7. nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:31 am

    TNC lies. He does have a smart point.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 11:36 am || Up

      “Mom, Dad … I’m black.”

      you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
      • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 11:48 am || Up
        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
        • mikeA Jun 27,2011 12:59 pm || Up

          According to my sources, Philip Roth had sex with Nicole Kidman, which he reported to his assistant as “I’VE BEEN FUCKING NICOLE KIDMAN!!!”

      • suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 8:38 pm || Up

  8. monkeyball Jun 27,2011 2:20 pm

    5. Seriously, WTF? And — does anyone have any idea what actually precipitated Rose yanking Tafoya’s creds? I’ve never listened to AAD, and don’t intend to, but it seems a really dipshit maneuver by the A’s unless Tafoya really transgressed some kind of boundary.

    I have an utterly unfounded theory that I’m somewhat (actually, not at all, otherwise I wouldn’t mention it) loath to share …

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • Leopold Bloom Jun 27,2011 2:24 pm || Up

      Rumor on ** is that he was critical of Geren.

      • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 2:49 pm || Up

        That’s not “rumor on **,” that’s what Dale tweeted himself. Which, as FSU below and others on ** point out, doesn’t seem sufficient on its own.

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 27,2011 2:25 pm || Up

      Do share, do share…

      I don’t have any insight, nor have I ever listened to the program in question. But it’s hard to imagine it’s only about criticisms of Geren.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 2:50 pm || Up

        What if Dale had outed/threatened to out Geren?

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  9. aardvark Jun 27,2011 2:24 pm

    Related to none of these, the A’s have signed the following players from the draft (round in parentheses):
    RHP Colton Murray (13), RHP Yacksel Rios (12), LHP Andre Kinder (42), LHP Austin Wright (8), 1B Mike Marshall (30), 3B Cody Asche (4), RHP Nate Eppley (29), RHP Thomas Girdwood (28), RHP Drew Granier (32), RHP Max Perlman (35), RHP Tanner Peters (16), RHP Sam Roberts (26), RHP Cecil Tanner (23), RHP T.J. Walz (15), LHP Eric Potter (19), LHP Brent Powers (18), C Nick Rickles (14), C Beau Taylor (5), 3B Jacob Tanis (13), SS Sean Jamieson (17), OF Xavier Macklin (12), OF Chad Oberacker (25), OF Rhett Stafford (22).

    • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 2:28 pm || Up

      How many of those are overslot?

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • aardvark Jun 27,2011 3:40 pm || Up

        I’m not sure. I don’t know what the slot recommendations are, but Crocker signed for $198,000, Taylor for $147,600, Alexander for $125,000, and Treinen for $52,500. Other players were not given bonuses.

    • suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 8:38 pm || Up

      Yacksel?

      • JediLeroy Jun 27,2011 8:45 pm || Up

        Anagram for “Lackeys”. Hmmm. But definitely one of the best names I’ve heard in a while.

        az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
  10. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 27,2011 2:43 pm

    monkeybait: Paul Thomas Anderson filming in the Berkeley Hills.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • batgirl Jun 27,2011 3:10 pm || Up

      Thank you!! I live a block away and spent some of the weekend googling trying to figure out what the heck they were filming. I’m glad to have an answer, because you sure couldn’t wheedle any information from the security guards posted at every blocked off street. Very hush hush.

      I’m in charge of our neighborhood email group list and I got an incredibly over-the-top panicked email on Thursday (which was sent to about 50 people) from one lady screeching about what an outrage it was that they were filming in our neighborhood and were going to have noisy trucks! bright lights! lots of people! I declined to forward it along to my group list, but was CCd on a reply from one of the 50 pronouncing that “Yes! They should put us all up at the Claremont Hotel for the weekend or provide similar compensation for our suffering.” This email was not a joke, mind you, it was completely serious.

      On Friday evening I took the pooches up to Hillside school for their usual romp, and found a few trucks and tons of equipment and electrical cables laid all over the schoolyard. I don’t think the production people were delighted that I proceeded to play fetch anyway, but they didn’t shoo me away. By Saturday they had the whole area on lock down and Bronte was steamed that she couldn’t go play ball. I did see one scene filming that involved some Dead Poets Society looking lads walking into the school. They also had some very cool old automobiles parked on the set.

      On Sunday morning most of the equipment was gone so I let the dogs off leash to run around. Of course Bronte made a beeline for a plate full of what looked like dolmas the catering had left behind. So in the end I guess she was compensated.

      • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 3:14 pm || Up

        Christ, what a dolmas hound

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  11. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 27,2011 2:45 pm

    Has FK been running super-slow for any of the rest of you? Every page has been loading slowly for me for about a week, whether from home, office, or smartphone.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 2:51 pm || Up

      Yep. And occasionally crapping out entirely.

      you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • andeux Jun 27,2011 2:51 pm || Up

      Yes.

      TINSTAAFK
    • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 3:19 pm || Up

      Hmm… The backend doesn’t seem to be slow (though I’d be interested in your testing). I optimized the DBs, which has been a problem in the past, but I’m not sure why else the frontend would be slow while the backend is fast.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • andeux Jun 27,2011 3:27 pm || Up

        OTOH, it doesn’t seem to be a connectivity issue. Pings and traceroutes are fine (~ 87 ms. for me).

        TINSTAAFK
      • monkeyball Jun 27,2011 3:29 pm || Up

        TWNMS

        The backend doesn’t seem to be slow (though I’d be interested in your testing)

        you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
        • the dogfather Jun 27,2011 4:21 pm || Up

          Things okay at home NM?

          The meaning of life is not so much found, as it is Made. -- Opus
          • nevermoor Jun 27,2011 4:57 pm || Up

            Ok enough to lob softballs in MB’s face.

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
            • JediLeroy Jun 27,2011 6:50 pm || Up

              Ok enough to lob softballs in MB’s face.

              Meta-TWSS. (“TWSS”S?)

              az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
        • dmoas Jun 27,2011 10:02 pm || Up

          It involves lots of meta-lube.

    • JediLeroy Jun 27,2011 3:20 pm || Up

      Yis.

      az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
    • suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 8:39 pm || Up

      Si.

  12. lenscrafters Jun 27,2011 3:28 pm

    Baseball things:

    The Red Sox are looking for a right handed hitting outfielder so chalk up another potential Willingham suitor. I’d be very surprised if Willingham isn’t traded by the deadline if he’s healthy.

    Ross is making his first rehab start on Thursday, McCarthy is making one more tomorrow before coming up on July 3rd, and Harden is making another rehab start on Thursday as well, per Jane Lee.

  13. monkeyball Jun 27,2011 3:29 pm

    Via Sully, I thought this throwaway line was actually the best part:

    the period from the financial collapse of 2019 to the end of the war in Afghanistan

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
    • suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 8:49 pm || Up

      That is waaay too preachy to be good satire.

  14. monkeyball Jun 27,2011 3:31 pm

    TWTSS

    Don’t simply muddle through and hope that growth will eventually return

    you better hope to God you don't show up in this little community, because you'll wish you had never come
  15. suspicious coin Jun 27,2011 9:30 pm

    we need another trick-pitch reliever.

    • the dogfather Jun 28,2011 6:23 am || Up

      Where have you gone,

      The meaning of life is not so much found, as it is Made. -- Opus
    • andeux Jun 28,2011 10:04 am || Up

      Is that even legal?

      TINSTAAFK
    • nevermoor Jun 28,2011 10:12 am || Up

      I assumed he’d throw mid gymnastics.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  16. Leopold Bloom Jun 28,2011 9:31 am

    You know, Mychael Urban just sucks.

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