I’m expecting great things today.
I am enough of an egotist to believe that the headline from today’s Slusser A’s Beat notes is not a random coincidence: Bullpen gets Seat Upgrade.
Casey Chavez, watch out…I am a far better choice to inherit the dominion of the sainted Brandon Buckley than you will ever be.
Frank and the Mothers’ first album was titled Freak Out! This too cannot be random coincidence.
“On a personal level, Freaking Out FreeKraut is a process whereby an individual casts off outmoded and restricting standards of thinking, dress, and social etiquette in order to express creatively his relationship to his immediate environment and the social structure as a whole. ”
Also, to all the rich and pretty glitterati of the AL East:
“I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you’re out there and you’re cute, maybe you’re beautiful. I just want to tell you somethin’ — there’s more of us UGLY MOTHERFUCKERS than you are, hey-y, so watch out. “
"Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
-Apparently Suzuki will make a rehab start on Tuesday and come off the DL on Wednesday. We could use him.
-Link is not broken
-Braden loves his late mother and his grandmother a lot, so probably the A’s will win today.
-.307/.470/.500
Outman pitching to Ellis today; BB is likely
Link fixed, thanks, gag kinda fails without it.
Reminding myself about Braden’s backstory just now led me to this 2007 pdf article about him, describing how while in high school he moved in with his Grandma where she managed and lived at the Quality Inn in Stockton, while his Mom who had raised him solo was dying of cancer. He credits Grandma with slapping some sense into him when he was risking his sports career by “hanging with the wrong crowd.” Poor Stockton white kid with wrong crowd at Quality Inn conjures a pretty specific wrong crowd image for me. Anyway, you’re right, I bet Mother’s Day is huge for Dallas.
This image?
iFSU, seat upgrade gets bullpen
That is fantastic. Can one of you savvy folk install that image into the Jumbotron on the FK banner? Maybe in place of the Pepsi ad. We need this.
If someone does that and emails me the image I’ll put it up.
Can one simply “Save Image As” from the existing site banner, ‘shop in the new pic, then mail it over to you? Or is it better to start with a hi-rez original that can’t be obtained by any ole schmoe? My crude Photoshop skillz might be sufficient, but I don’t want to pursue the Save Image As route if the result will be too low-quality to work.
Save As is the winner.
I don’t have any special image elsewhere.
Braden looked sharp there in the first. As do the pink bats.
If they’re gonna do pink armbands, they ought to wear matching uniforms.
I’m on board with today’s strategy of cheap singles and Dallas.
Longoria trying to bunt for a hit…I’m OK with Tampa being reduced to that level of desperation.
Just tuning in.
Um, wow.
This is what happens when teams don’t run across the mound.
Braden’s got location, but not velocity.
So far as you can tell from there
So you’re saying there’s a 50-50 chance?
Things I like about Patterson: he doesn’t wear one of those silly necklaces that almost everyone else wears.
That’s all.
Suzuki gets an exception
kenko does that right
I’m not sure Landon Powell even tries to tag on a fly ball to the warning track.
I think we need an additional new outfield wall sponsor: Formula 209.
Some nice copywriting to F(il)K on the About Us tab:
TV off, radio on. I’m ready.
YES!
wow
YAY!
16 minutes and counting
MOTHERFUCKER YES.
Watching Dallas hugging his Grandma is bringing tears to my eyes. His too, looks like.
Ditto.
me too.
Were you in tears after no-hitting those deaf kids?
(And, ditto)
Woulda been if I hadn’t given up that walk.
… and, were they all from the 209 (where they don’t do too much talking)?
I don’t get it, but then I don’t get any of your photo posts.
That being said, WTF JUST HAPPENED?!
As far as I’m concerned, FSU gets ALL of the credit for this. This post is fucking genius.
1. Don’t worry, I don’t get any of them either. I used to occasionally ask him to explain, but he never responds, because, well, I don’t know why exactly. Apparently it is more important than I realize to retain an air of mystery around blog comment wordplay.
2. I give FSU 60% credit. Braden gets 25%, his grandma gets 8%, Kouzmanoff gets 5%. God and the 12,228 on hand split the remaining 2%.
Bullshit. I get at least 1.7%. It’s in my contract.
Just know that whatever portion you claim, it’s coming out of God’s cut. The rest is not really up for debate.
Okay, I’ll settle for .65%, but I want a voice at the shareholder’s meeting.
HOLY FREAKING MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS HOLY
Happy Mother’s Day to the Mother of Alll That Is Holy.
Dallas’s mom died when he was in high school. His grandma and him lived in fucking hotels. No one deserves this more than him.
Fuck you A-Rod. Fuck you CC. You’ll be hearing about him now.
You know some reporter is going to ask A-Rod about Braden. If he’s smart, A-Rod will bury the whole thing by congratulating Dallas and promising to never step on his pitching mound ever again.
HAHAHA
Video of Braden hugging grandma
Went to a party and didn’t see, hear, or gameday any of the game. Holy motherfuckin kraut. Yo, perfecto, bitch!
I was, unfortunately, in Bed Bath and Beyond for new-condo stuff when my dad called.
Old School is true.
An hour later and I’m still totally geeked by this. What an amazing, incredible, wonderful day for Dallas Braden, the A’s, and us fans.
Jr heard me screaming and ran to me. He leaped into my open arms and we did a little dance. Yeah, I’m stupid. Yeah, it’s just baseball. But you know what? It’s AWESOME!
The people at the Berkeley marina must have thought I was nuts. With every out from the 7th inning on I was screaming, jumping up and down, pumping my fist. I was hoping another A’s fan would walk by with a hat on or something so I’d have someone to share it with. But there were none so I hugged my puppy instead.
I hugged my mom’s dog!
I’m glad you were excited…not excited enough to come over here and celebrate with us, of course, but I’m happy for you nonetheless.
pffft!
I exclusively create content here. I make swag for FK, exclusive FK swag. I’m involved heavily in the nebulous talks of a reading group, and I’ll probably be the impetus behind an FK tsilgate. I’m pretty okay with my level of FK participation. I’ve always maintained I prefer game threads there.
what’s a tsilgate
Thanks, and go As.
burn!
Ouch, did I touch a nerve? No worries, Bloomie, I just missed ya is all. Tell ya what…when it’s tsilgate time, I’ll grill your meat of choice.
Also, insert “no there there” joke.
Just get tired of living like a kid with divorced parents sometimes.
Though I really like what FK is.
Fwiw… no need to be defensive. FK is not intended to be (and is not) a complete substitute for **.
If SBN is the corporation, and AN is situated on, say, the fourth floor of corporate headquarters, then FK is a
cubicle in the corner of that fourth floor (near the bathroom)taco stand across the street from the parking lot (near the Chevron station), where people gather to gossip and comment ironically on the last meeting they were in.You’ve happened on my secret: I’m still working for Blez. He’s the Gus Fring of sports blogging.
Gus’s last name is FRING? That’s anticlimactic.
I think the writers are making a pun with him and the opening credits: FringElements.
There’s a regional burger place here called Cheeburger Cheeburger that has a huge platter of homemade fries and onion rings that they call frings.
Edited for analogical accuracy.
Oh my. Oh my. That was AMAZING. I took a short nap in the afternoon and woke up in the 4th inning. I wanted to take my pup to the Berkeley marina, so I thought, well, no hits yet, I’ll just tape the rest of the game just in case. Then I proceeded to walk around the marina, mesmerized by the Korach broadcast til the last out. There just aren’t words to describe how wonderful this is. I’m so glad it was Braden. And his Grandma…KenKo made me cry talking about them hugging–I think he almost cried.
Korach did a terrific job, but I also wish Bill were still alive. The two of them together on this broadcast would have been great.
Dallas Freaking Braden.
Also, per Slusser’s twitter, Braden’s grandma is as kick ass as her grandson. And this game thread certainly did hit the mark in advance, FSU!
I can see admitting you were walking the dog at the marina, but who admits they were shopping at bed, bath & beyond?
Cool kids.
You know what’s awesome. I randomly decided to test the “schedule DVR from computer” directTV feature on this game even though I knew I’d never watch it.
Now I’m going to watch it.
That is awesome.
Strangely enough, because I was going to be at Mom’s, I DVRed it too!
EN says he knows how to turn it into an .avi…
Want!
If we can get it done, I share.
It is the Rays feed, though…
These things happen.
It’s also being rebroadcast today on CSN-CA at noon and 7:00, for those of us who were too lame to watch it live.
Hey, those beds and baths aren’t going to beyond themselves.
Meesus Moonkeyball hates it when I call it “Bloodbath and Beyond.”
they sell caskets there, too. (that’s the “beyond”)
I forget which comedian I borrowed that from, but mrs salb918 loved it.
I hope for your sake it wasn’t Patton Oswalt
I love Patton Oswalt, and he’s sal-sized, too!
I’ll have you know that we are in possession of some quite nice curtain rods! And an ironing board!!
Also, they’re selling 4-packs of 100W-esque fluorescent bulbs for $0.99, which is the greatest deal in the history of light bulbs.
Also, great info. Setting my DVR now.
Official Monkeyball Rules for B3:
1. Hoard the $5-off-$15-purchase coupons
2. If you find the $10-off-$30-purchase coupons, even better
3. Make nice with the cashier — sometimes they’ll apply your supposed-to-be-single-use 20% off coupon to multiple items
4. If they won’t apply your 20% off coupon to multiple items, be steadfast and purchase only one item. Then go to Trader Joe’s. Then come back, and purchase one more item at B3. Then go to the Rack. Then come back, and purchase one more item at B3. Then go have a coffee at Peet’s. Then come back, and purchase one more item at B3.
5. They ignore coupon expiry dates
6. Always check out the clearance bins. Some very good finds in there.
4. We bring in a stack of 20% coupons, and we’ve never been hassled about using multiples at one time.
I don’t get Trader Joe’s. Maybe it’s because I don’t buy pre-made 1 person meals, but I don’t see what they have that Rainbow Market doesn’t do 100x better (except, of course, meat, but TJ’s meat is nothing special)
I only use them for certain things: their dairy selection (esp. cheese) is high-quality and quite affordable (esp the Cabot cheddar, the atomised parmesan, and the French Village cream-top yogurt), they have the best price I’ve ever seen on Laphroaig, their Cheerios knockoff are good and cheap (only now do I fully understand how essential Cheerios knockoffs are to parental success), they have the best price on Doc Bronner’s.
Also, TWSS:
More generally, they tend to have pretty good quality and very good prices on lots of staple items – bagged tea, rice, pasta, bread, cheeses, chips, crackers. And the frozen tarte d’alsace is a great thing to keep around for an emergency snack or light meal. It’s definitely not the place to go for most fresh foods (meat, fish or produce), though there are a few decent items in those categories as well.
Amen on the Joe’s O’s.
The mushroom and truffle flatbread is a great emergency meal (just add arugula).
The dairy and beer are pretty reasonable.
Oh, and their “plastic bread” (old family term for storebought nonartisanal) quality and price are good.
And their prices on both rice milk and carbonized water used to be good, before I moved to the sticks and had no access to TJ…fucking heathens.
Holy crap. Holy crap. Holy CRAP!
Me and Mrs. Ice Cream took our younger scooplet to a matinee performance of Rogers and Hammerstein’s “Cinderella” today. After the play we got in the car just as KenKo was signing off saying there was baseball magic today with the A’s first perfect game in 42 years! Holy crap. We both teared up right then and there. I said, “Still, what we did (for Hayley) this afternoon was more important.” And I believe that. But holy CRAP!
We’re watching it on COMCAST On Demand right now.
I’m giddy.
What a great 24 hours for the Bay Area indeed.
So uhh, is it too early to wonder when Blez makes a t-shirt out of this?
lol. I got an email, the CGVs at AN were updated and you can’t swear “a lot” now.
Thanks, and go As.
Fuck that!
“FreeKraut is a process whereby an individual casts off outmoded and restricting standards of thinking, dress, and social etiquette in order to express creatively his relationship to his immediate environment and the social structure as a whole. â€
My response to his email was that there should probably have been some type of front page post outlining the new CGV updates, sponsored by Sesame Street.
Thanks, and go As.
I have no intention of being involved in that.
perhaps Romper Room
Thanks, and go As.
Niiiiicee!!
I kind of like that as a tag line instead of the one we have.
Cocksuckers!
What a collection of villanious pottle-deep joitheads.
I’d give that a 10 except I don’t know what a joithead is.
I’m a villanious pottle-deep joithead?
darn.
Wow, I just read the CG’s there. It’s a fucking novel. Here are FK’s posting rules:
Don’t be
a dickan engorged clown phallus**Actually, go ahead.
Sounds like a book club nomination.
iFSU as the site’s chief administrator Nico may, at any time, choose to bypass the 3-strikes process
But remember people, NOTHING HAS CHANGED.
Dallas Braden celebrates with his grandmother, Peggy Lindsey of Stockton, after pitching a perfect game on Mother’s Day. Braden’s mother has passed away and his grandmother attended the game. The chain around Braden’s neck is a memento of his mother that used to hold her wedding ring until he lost it years ago. He has worn it for years and when it has broken, he’s held it together with paper clips and safety pins, Lindsey said.
Photo: Carlos Avila Gonzalez / The Chronicle
Slusser’s article:
Just watched all 27 outs. Not to harsh on the mellow, but didn’t it seem like all 4 outs to LF were very nearly misplayed?
Yeah, I was clamoring for Gross to play the last 2 innings.
Yes
Yes and that’s because Eric Patterson sucks.
Thanks, and go As.
Also: Rajai very nearly did this
Jack Cust did.
Geez. Even knowing the result, watching that last pitch to Kapler was nerve-racking. The count was 3-1.
One more ball, Kapler walks and there goes the perfect game.
Braden never hesitated.
Nice Joe Posnanski article:
http://joeposnanski.com/JoeBlog/2010/05/09/perfection/
Very nice.
Told my family not to spoil the game, got home and just watched. So fucking awesome. Braden is already one of the most likable guys the A’s have ever had, and with his mother and mother’s day. Damn… White jerseys, too.
Is it possible to listen to Ken calling the 9th somewhere?
Just the last out on mlb.com. Lemme know if you find anything else.
All the TV and radio calls of the last out are here.
This is so much fun, reading the whole thread start to finish after the fact. Absolutely
brilliantFree (Kraut) FSU. I’m in MN visiting my mom, and went to the Twins game with sister and brother-in-law. More on Target Field later, but suffice it to say I was feeling a bit jealous. Then, driving back to White Bear Lake, I started getting texts and was wondering what was up, ’til I got the great news. So awesome. The ESPN summary on my cell-phone had a mention of the A-Rod controversy, and mentioned that on Fri he said he didn’t want to comment on it any more because he “didn’t want to extend his 15 minutes of fame.” Those 15 minutes just became a lifetime, so suck on that, A-Rod.The Baseball Project is going to have to update their Harvey Haddix song.
I really hope Scott McCaughey writes a Braden song. Since they’re doing the in-season compose-on-the-fly “album” thing, he just might.
Why is steve winn a yankees fan?
He’s a committed localist (as am I, relatively speaking).
So if they move to San Jose, will you become a full-fledged Giants fan?
I hardly get to the Mausoleum for games much anymore anyway, so probably won’t impact me much.
But will you switch allegiances?
You know this is an area of confluence for you and ****, right? The Venn Diagram.
Oooooo, there’s a neat project for someone!
some good stuff in the btf thread
#4 is just all kinds of win.
Justice Kagan is going to write some fantastic opinions, only to have Alito sneak into her office at the last minute and sneak in some “nots” that reverse the meaning.
Top 9th audio in this thread:
http://mbd.scout.com/mb.aspx?s=304&f=2062&t=5933331
Nice link, thanks.
I miss you guys.
Where did we go?
Why have you disappeared? Has Mr. Poppy taken to beating you for communicating with us?! Give us your coordinates!
You’re spending your days playing WoW?
No, but I am spending my days not being allowed to play outside and/or with others.
Shouldn’t have broken in to steal your boyfriend’s pit bull.
MY CAT IS FOR THE HORDE! LOSER!!!!111
One of the nicer things about FK is that boards never shut down. I can comment here and tell you that although I’m happy to be in California, I’m equally as happy to not be in Florida any longer. That place sucked.
Fuck you! I already read 38,000 new comments today even though I’m not feeling good, and you go and make me read something superfluous attached to an ancient post.
this
I rescind my earlier offer of a cookie. And dfa, you’re a prick.
What is Rupert Murdoch?
I recommend Fighting Cock. Though I assume you’re not cleared for that just yet.
{self-censors}
Amen–you all gotta slow your roll. I can’t keep up here.
One thing I want to know though…if you’re new to FK and logon for the first time, does the “unread comments” section include every single post from the beginning of FK?
It didn’t for me. I think it’s just since the creation date.
No, nothing before you create your account (which was an issue when it was putting in the creation times wrong for awhile there).