Blame Canada, Blame Canada ← FREE KRAUT!

Blame Canada, Blame Canada 373

Our heroic Athletics defend the honor of America against invaders from the north as the Toronto Blue Jays come to the Oakland-Alameda Coliseum. Canada, known primarily for maple syrup, universal health care, and the McKenzie Brothers will send their best to battle our boys. I’ve posted the starting pitching match ups in invisible ink so just rub some lemon on your screen if you want to see who’s pitching.

 

Go A’s…and God Bless America!

373 thoughts on “Blame Canada, Blame Canada

  1. Bed Jun 5,2017 6:45 pm

    Oops…did two game threads get posted? I’m sorry. Do you want me to delete mine?

    But seriously, folks...
    • Soaker Jun 5,2017 6:47 pm || Up

      No, I deleted mine. I didn’t get a Lee Greenwood reference into mine.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • Bed Jun 5,2017 6:48 pm || Up

        Heh…okay, you can have the next one.

        But seriously, folks...
  2. Glorious Mundy Jun 5,2017 6:57 pm
  3. Bed Jun 5,2017 6:59 pm

    Are there any positives when it comes to Twitter? As someone who doesn’t use it all I hear about are people getting in trouble on it or whatever dumb ass thing our President has said in the last ten minutes.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 7:38 pm || Up

      its a good news and comedy organizer

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:40 pm || Up

        I use the Apple news app and Flipboard.

        But seriously, folks...
  4. Glorious Mundy Jun 5,2017 7:01 pm

    Currently watching hockey like some kind of Canadian.

    • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:13 pm || Up

      Next you’re going to tell us you’ve become a socialist and that all you eat now are jelly donuts and gravy fries.

      But seriously, folks...
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 5,2017 7:34 pm || Up

        Please stop with the cultural appropriation, Bed.

        • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:37 pm || Up

          When I grow up I want to be a Quebec academic.

          But seriously, folks...
        • AV Jun 5,2017 7:39 pm || Up

          alright, who’s the cultural owner of hypocrisy? because they and barbara kruger both might want to have a word with the wolf-cryer pictured there.

          *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
          • Bed Jun 5,2017 8:41 pm || Up

            When I grow up I want to be a cultural owner of hypocrisy.

            But seriously, folks...
            • andeux Jun 5,2017 8:44 pm || Up

              I can only afford to rent hypocrisy.

              TINSTAAFK
  5. Bed Jun 5,2017 7:04 pm

    Mulder is doing the entire homestand it would seem.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Soaker Jun 5,2017 7:07 pm || Up

      Mulder is scheduled to work about two series per month, so it makes sense for him to make the series consecutive.

      It’s Ken and Ray only on radio tonight. I knew Vince was off but thought Roxy might be there. This raises the possibility of the ear-stabbing pain of Ray’s play-by-play.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:16 pm || Up

        I just don’t like baseball on radio anymore. I grew up with it with Bill King and then I listened to a ton of Royals games in college but now it just doesn’t hold my attention.

        But seriously, folks...
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 8:07 pm || Up

          Oh, man, I dunno, radio baseball is perfect. Especially when your team sucks.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 8:05 pm || Up

        I was at the troughs just now and Ray’s pxp burned me like the hot stabbing knives of regret, if yaknowhatimean

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • andeux Jun 5,2017 8:07 pm || Up

          Didn’t Zappa have a song about that?

          TINSTAAFK
        • Soaker Jun 5,2017 8:24 pm || Up

          At least he is forced to talk mostly about baseball when he’s doing PxP. I’m glad I have the TV picture to accompany it though. And, sure, I could just listen to Kuiper and Mulder, but somehow as a longtime A’s fan I feel obligated to endure Ray, for one night at least.

          What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 7:40 pm || Up

      i’m listening to the canadian radio feed. they are great

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  6. Bed Jun 5,2017 7:07 pm

    Friends and family only crowd…and it looks like our guys don’t have many friends.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Soaker Jun 5,2017 7:55 pm || Up

      They will get over 10,000 announced attendance tonight by including the seagulls.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:57 pm || Up

        If the A’s can monetize those seagulls they’ll be rich.

        But seriously, folks...
      • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 8:09 pm || Up

        I put it at 3,800 humans and maybe 40 seagulls.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • Soaker Jun 5,2017 8:27 pm || Up

          Officially announced as 12,890.

          What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  7. Bed Jun 5,2017 7:11 pm

    That Donaldson guy looks familiar.

    But seriously, folks...
  8. Bed Jun 5,2017 7:12 pm

    Wait…did Davis just overthrow somebody?

    But seriously, folks...
  9. andeux Jun 5,2017 7:12 pm

    Khris Davis “doesn’t have the strongest arm.”

    TINSTAAFK
  10. ptbnl Jun 5,2017 7:21 pm
    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:26 pm || Up

      After decades of screwing around with other countries elections, especially during the cold war, it would seem karma has come back to bite us. It’s going to be interesting to see where this all goes.

      But seriously, folks...
      • ptbnl Jun 5,2017 7:40 pm || Up

        Indeed – especially if Drumpf knew (which would be consistent with his modus operandi of pre-emptively falsely accusing opponents of doing what he is actually doing)

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
      • andeux Jun 5,2017 7:58 pm || Up

        Karma would be the people who fked with other countries’ elections being harmed by other countries fking with ours. This is (more or less) the same people benefiting.

        TINSTAAFK
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 8:11 pm || Up

          Sad!

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • AV Jun 5,2017 7:31 pm || Up

      the hack, or that young woman’s name?

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • ptbnl Jun 5,2017 7:37 pm || Up

        I was thinking about the hack, though the name is spectacular.

        What’s depressing is that it’s the leaking that’s trending on FB, not the foreign government hacking voting machines.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • AV Jun 5,2017 7:45 pm || Up

          to be fair it’s not just social media. i cycled through my top afternoon papers and only got the first part. wasn’t till i mistakenly went to sf gate that i saw the second. and didn’t fully trust it till i went to the intercept to verify.

          there’s probably some journalistic integrity issue there, but that was way too many clicks to get to such a scandal.

          *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
          • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:48 pm || Up

            I feel overwhelmed by all the information. It feels like Trump has been President for 12 years or so.

            But seriously, folks...
            • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:50 pm || Up

              are we still talking about this story?

              I have $5. No I don\'t.
            • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:51 pm || Up

              dammit

              I have $5. No I don\'t.
              • doctorK Jun 5,2017 9:59 pm || Up

                666 5th Ave? I knew these people were evil, but I had no idea how much.

  11. MikeV Jun 5,2017 7:33 pm

    In the state of Alaska it’s illegal to whisper in someone’s ear while they are hunting moose.

    I just wanted you all to know that.

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

    Thanks, and go As.

    • Bed Jun 5,2017 7:38 pm || Up

      Those damn liberals and all their nanny state laws.

      But seriously, folks...
  12. Bed Jun 5,2017 7:42 pm

    Ryon Healy = Hope

    But seriously, folks...
  13. Bed Jun 5,2017 7:44 pm

    “Healy seems like a confident guy…I bet his girlfriend is at least a 9.” A movie version of a scout watching this game.

    But seriously, folks...
  14. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:09 pm

    manaea seems to be losing stikes inside to righties

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  15. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 8:13 pm

    @bed: wait, how many ” is Healy’s gf?

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  16. Soaker Jun 5,2017 8:18 pm

    Sexual, Healy!

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  17. Bed Jun 5,2017 8:18 pm

    When Ryon Healy walks into a room women want to be him and men want to be with him.

    But seriously, folks...
  18. Bed Jun 5,2017 8:23 pm

    Now that God has created the perfect being in Ryon Healy he plans to retire to Tampa and take up bocce ball.

    But seriously, folks...
  19. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:27 pm

    manaea is getting jobbed according to blue jays tv

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Bed Jun 5,2017 8:28 pm || Up

      Traitor.

      But seriously, folks...
      • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:37 pm || Up

        i am listening to an authentic bay area treasure

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:37 pm || Up

        i am listening to an authentic bay area treasure

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:39 pm || Up
        I have $5. No I don\'t.
  20. Bed Jun 5,2017 8:28 pm

    Hey FSU…if you yell Free Kraut rules I bet we could hear you.

    But seriously, folks...
  21. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:30 pm

    carrerra was struck out

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  22. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:34 pm

    donaldons just too strike 3

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  23. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 8:46 pm

    Rajai is to bring back face sweat bands?

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  24. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 9:14 pm

    I was gonna run on the field bare-chested but a vision of Phil Collins told me no.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  25. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 5,2017 9:15 pm

    Wait, Ryon’s hashtag is #Healyeah? Perfect

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  26. Soaker Jun 5,2017 9:16 pm

    I notice on the ribbon boards they still want us to #RaiseThePlouffe for the All-Star Game.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  27. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:17 pm

    tulowitski is not a short stop anymore. I think 47 year old me throws harder

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  28. elcroata Jun 5,2017 9:26 pm

    So, just turned in. We have the lead, so nothing to worry about, what with the stellar defense our guys are playing and the bullet-proof bullpen, right?

    Because survival is insufficient
  29. andeux Jun 5,2017 9:27 pm

    Not crazy about Axford facing their good hitters.
    But not really crazy about any of our other relievers facing their good hitters either.

    TINSTAAFK
    • Soaker Jun 5,2017 9:35 pm || Up

      Wait till it’s Casilla vs. Donaldson and Bautista in the ninth.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:42 pm || Up

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • andeux Jun 5,2017 9:50 pm || Up

        I’ll be too blinded by rage at the leadoff walk to Darwin Barney to see that.

        TINSTAAFK
        • andeux Jun 5,2017 10:05 pm || Up

          Oh, Barney was already out of the game. That’s a relief.

          TINSTAAFK
    • Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:42 pm || Up

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  30. elcroata Jun 5,2017 9:29 pm

    Normally, when I see 9.00 ERA next to a reliever, I go – oh, sure, one inning, one run.

    Because survival is insufficient
  31. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:33 pm

    why not chapman herer?

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  32. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:34 pm

    canha didn’t get the memo about staying in the box

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  33. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:36 pm

    this is a terrible strike zone according to rsn. i think its mostly going against the a’s. is martin a good framer and phegley a poor one?

    ec?

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Soaker Jun 5,2017 9:45 pm || Up

      Phegley: This pitch is going to bounce and there’s nobody on base, so I’ll just let it go.
      Plate umpire: OUCH. Goddammit Phegley.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  34. Soaker Jun 5,2017 9:39 pm

    Matt Joyce, defensive replacement. Sigh.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 5,2017 9:43 pm || Up

      Olson is an actual good outfielder as I recall.

  35. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:39 pm

    something about this guy. i should hate him because he is an ass, but…

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  36. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:40 pm

    blame canada, but the A’s are outsouurcing the final three innings to immigrants!

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  37. Future Ed Jun 5,2017 9:40 pm

    blame canada, but the A’s are outsouurcing the final three innings to immigrants!

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  38. doctorK Jun 5,2017 9:49 pm

    Suck it Russell Martin

  39. Soaker Jun 5,2017 10:01 pm

    A 1-2-3 inning from Casilla is not a possibility, so Donaldson is, at minimum, the tying run.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Soaker Jun 5,2017 10:13 pm || Up

      And we have an upset.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  40. Glorious Mundy Jun 5,2017 10:06 pm

  41. Glorious Mundy Jun 5,2017 10:13 pm

    That was an all around acceptable performance.

  42. Future Ed Jun 6,2017 10:07 am
    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 11:34 am || Up

      Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, since everything my client ever says is a provable lie, how can you use his statements against him?

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 11:35 am || Up

        He’s a libel-proof plaintiff, a judgment-proof defendant, and an impeachment-proof president.

    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 11:54 am || Up

      ‘The guy won’t pay and he won’t listen’

      Trump needs guys like Ted Olson and Paul Clement so much more than they need him. It’s absurd to think they would sign up for this assignment.

      • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 12:21 pm || Up

        can confirm. Clients that don’t listen are awful. I have a guy threatening because (some inside baseball stuff) after getting his 3 count felony case dismissed. looking at 6 years 4 months mandatory prison. judges hands would be tied on the prison thing.

        he adamantly told me several times that he is a trump supporter.

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 6:32 pm || Up

      • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 6:34 pm || Up

        MikeV approves:

        Glued even more than usual to the cable news shows that blare from the televisions in his private living quarters, or from the 60-inch flat screen he had installed in his cramped study off the Oval Office, he has fumed about “fake news.”

        • MikeV Jun 6,2017 7:02 pm || Up

          Good starter size

          And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

          Thanks, and go As.

          • nevermoor Jun 12,2017 9:47 am || Up

            To be fair, 1600 Penn isn’t in the suburbs.

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 6:40 pm || Up

        “The president’s lawyers and aides…hope to keep him busy Thursday with other events meant to compete for his — and the news media’s — attention.”

        Syria? North Korea? A Russian or Chinese fighter jet? Something’s getting bombed.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 6:47 pm || Up

          shade aside, this is ultimately what insulates trump, although it shouldn’t respondeat superior and all.

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 8:45 pm || Up

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
  43. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 11:09 am

    Khris Davis tweaked his hamstring last night, so naturally the A’s sent down the fifth outfielder instead of the eighth reliever.

    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 11:13 am || Up

      k davis
      r davis
      m canha
      m joyce

      any outfielder the A’s have is the 1rst one, yeah?

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 11:36 am || Up

      Hahn and Cotton in an 18 hour span, gonna need some bullpen arms.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  44. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 11:49 am

    That thing in your rearview mirror is getting larger, Trevor.

    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 12:23 pm || Up

      any argument for not promoting? cn he strick out MORE than the current team?

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  45. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 12:01 pm

    This is a pathetic TV sports day for the home-bound. So I’m watching Major League.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  46. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 6:22 pm

    Oklahoma beat Florida yesterday in game 1 of best-of-three women’s softball World Series on a walkoff homer in the 17th inning (regulation is 7 innings). Now they’ve playing again and its 5-4 heading to the top of the 4th. Gals be slugging.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  47. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 6:29 pm

    150

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  48. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 6:53 pm

    WTF???

    • andeux Jun 6,2017 7:25 pm || Up

      Has to prove himself worthy of Brandon Phillips’ old number.

      TINSTAAFK
  49. Soaker Jun 6,2017 7:15 pm

    Grandpa Lew had to stop by at some point to pick up his tarps, so tonight’s the night.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Bed Jun 6,2017 7:28 pm || Up

      Is Lew wearing his Dodgers cap?

      But seriously, folks...
    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 7:31 pm || Up

      looks like george lucas behind the blue jays dugout

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  50. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:19 pm

    Rajai overslid the bag there just for practice.

  51. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:29 pm

    I know anytime I manage a Major League game I must have at least 7 right handed relief pitchers.

    But seriously, folks...
  52. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:32 pm

    That might be the best play I’ve seen Healy make at third.

    But seriously, folks...
  53. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:32 pm

    Ms. Dolan seems to have an entire section to herself.

  54. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:35 pm

    Ugh.

    • ptbnl Jun 6,2017 9:38 pm || Up

      Safe, apart from the British people whose human rights she’s taking away.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • dmoas Jun 7,2017 8:46 am || Up

      So lock the entire country up to keep them safe.

      • ptbnl Jun 7,2017 10:18 am || Up

        Just the brown people.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • dmoas Jun 7,2017 10:43 am || Up

          No, you kill them. I’m talking about making sure white people are safe. Gotta lock them up and bubble wrap their buildings. No communication either. You wouldn’t want trouble makers making plans or anything.

  55. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:38 pm

    Is it winter in Oakland?

    But seriously, folks...
    • andeux Jun 6,2017 7:44 pm || Up

      It’s winter in America.

      TINSTAAFK
      • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 7:48 pm || Up

        Things are pretty fucking bad when I miss Ronald Reagan.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  56. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:41 pm

    I deleted all the news apps on my phone and I’ve decided to get all my news from old Sacramento Bee’s from 1991.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 7:47 pm || Up

      Can you give me updates on the war in iraq?

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:52 pm || Up

      Not the Bee, but:

      Boxer made two distinct appeals.

      To the overall crowd, she returned often to the theme “it’s time for America.” It served to shift debate from her congressional vote against the use of force in the Gulf, which is certain to be a campaign issue. She peppered her speech with symbols of excess, including one-time billionaire Donald Trump and investment banker Michael Milken.

      “They had their turn.”

      • andeux Jun 6,2017 7:54 pm || Up

        And people think I dig up old threads.

        TINSTAAFK
  57. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:43 pm

    I will say this…Lew has great hair.

    But seriously, folks...
  58. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:49 pm

    Way to leave your bat in the way, Josh.

    • Soaker Jun 6,2017 7:53 pm || Up

      Often the umpire will get rid of it, but sometimes they don’t think of it when the ball doesn’t leave the infield. Carlos Gomez got hurt trying to avoid a bat against the A’s and hasn’t played in almost a month.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 7:54 pm || Up

      @sammiller

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:57 pm || Up

        Oh wow.

        I miss him on the BP podcast so much.

        • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 8:11 pm || Up

          Interesting stuff, I wonder if any big league ump would ever call interference on a bat left in play. I doubt it. For the same reasons most of the big leaguers said they’d never think of it in the instant. I can’t see an ump (or replay) discerning the intent.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 7:58 pm || Up

        Two games in a row!

  59. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:49 pm

    Heads up play by Alonso…put that one in the trade video package.

    But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 7:53 pm || Up

      Goins runs the bases like he wants to be an Athletic some day.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  60. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:54 pm

    Lew must be in the loo.

    But seriously, folks...
  61. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:56 pm

    If ignorance is bliss I feel like I should be happier.

    But seriously, folks...
  62. Bed Jun 6,2017 7:59 pm

    Lew is a foot taller, 40 years younger, and covered in A’s gear.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 8:02 pm || Up

      not for nothing, but lew is a six footer. he just slouches like mr. burns

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  63. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:02 pm

    The A’s likely won’t have to worry about handing out too many Gold Glove bonus checks.

    But seriously, folks...
  64. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:05 pm

    Replay in Baseball…making an already slow game even slower.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 8:13 pm || Up

      Worse than the replays are the pauses where the manager is considering asking for a replay but ultimately doesn’t. Those annoy the hell out of me.

  65. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:06 pm

    Lew is back…he saw that an A’s fan was in his seat and that seat is for Dodgers fans only.

    But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 8:17 pm || Up

      Things are pretty fucking bad when I miss Frank McCourt.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Bed Jun 6,2017 8:18 pm || Up

        Things are so bad I miss OakFoSho.

        But seriously, folks...
  66. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:08 pm

    Jesse Hahn is one of those A’s starters that I will forget ever existed within a year or so.

    But seriously, folks...
  67. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:11 pm

    A Marcus Semien action figure…that’ll pack the stadium.

    But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 8:13 pm || Up

      Does rigor mortis count as action?

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Bed Jun 6,2017 8:16 pm || Up

        The hot stiff kind…or perhaps the cold stiff kind.

        But seriously, folks...
      • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 8:16 pm || Up

        clay foot bobble head

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
  68. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:15 pm

    Not having my guy Khris Davis in the field is taking away a lot of my enjoyment of this game…thankfully Lew is there.

    But seriously, folks...
  69. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:19 pm

    Just to fuck with everybody I think I’m going to talk like a valley girl tomorrow all day at work.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 8:27 pm || Up

      about a year ago, I started wearing bow ties on friday only. I would encourage people to follow suit, saying “Bow tie Friday, get on board.” If someone said “yeah, I should!” I would pull out a bow tie out and put the lie to their words.

      anyway a few months ago I started doing on thursday to fuck with people.

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Bed Jun 6,2017 8:29 pm || Up

        I was bold today…my tie had stripes.

        But seriously, folks...
  70. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:20 pm

    Hmmm….perhaps wide shots of the Coliseum not the best idea ever.

    But seriously, folks...
  71. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:22 pm

    The Blue Jays are kinda dumb on the base paths.

    But seriously, folks...
  72. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:24 pm

    Lew now sitting alone with his thoughts…remembering that time that Bud made his move and they made sweet, sweet love in their dorm room.

    But seriously, folks...
  73. Soaker Jun 6,2017 8:28 pm

    I can’t understand how anyone can drink a Red Bull in the bullpen in the 5th inning of a night game, and then get enough sleep to come back for a 12:30 game tomorrow.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Bed Jun 6,2017 8:32 pm || Up

      I’ve never had a Red Bull just in case anyone was wondering.

      But seriously, folks...
    • MikeV Jun 6,2017 8:47 pm || Up

      Same way people can drink coffee all day.

      And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

      Thanks, and go As.

  74. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:30 pm

    I give all the blame on that one to Chip Hale.

    But seriously, folks...
  75. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:33 pm

    That’s a Rosey line drive right there.

    But seriously, folks...
  76. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:38 pm

    Lew now eating some ice cream…bringing back memories of the sundae he had at the World’s Fair in 1914

    But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 8:42 pm || Up

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  77. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:54 pm

    I can’t imagine sitting near those people who play drums the entire game.

    But seriously, folks...
    • AV Jun 6,2017 10:13 pm || Up

      shoutout EM, tho.

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • Englishmajor Jun 7,2017 1:15 pm || Up

        I love checking Twitter for the opposing team’s fans complaints about us.

        • AV Jun 7,2017 2:12 pm || Up

          me too… but someone musta took his samsung PDA away from him as he went into the war room, because he hasn’t twitted in hours!

          *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  78. Soaker Jun 6,2017 8:55 pm

    That was quite the A’s-like play in the outfield.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  79. Bed Jun 6,2017 8:55 pm

    Beane just got wood thinking about trading for their left fielder.

    But seriously, folks...
  80. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 8:57 pm

    The red hot Blue Jays came to Oakland and caught a nasty case of Athletics.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • Bed Jun 6,2017 9:03 pm || Up

      Doctor, Doctor give me the news I got bad case of A’s flu.

      But seriously, folks...
      • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:09 pm || Up

        Things are pretty fucking bad when I miss Robert Palmer.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  81. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:02 pm

    So far the A’s have looked pretty good at the plate, in the field, and on the mound. They’re showing off to impress Lew.

    But seriously, folks...
  82. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:07 pm

    Lew has morphed again…I’m starting to think he may be a member of The X-Men.

    But seriously, folks...
  83. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:20 pm

    Glen pronounces people’s names differently than everyone else does. Does he drink during the games?

    But seriously, folks...
    • MikeV Jun 6,2017 9:27 pm || Up

      Don’t you?

      And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

      Thanks, and go As.

      • Bed Jun 6,2017 9:29 pm || Up

        I watch all these games sober…which just proves I’m crazy.

        But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:30 pm || Up

      I have it on reasonably solid authority that at parties Glen gets drunk and does his announcer voice for laughs.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 9:32 pm || Up

        While Fosse just sidles up real close and asks “how great does does it feel?”

      • Bed Jun 6,2017 9:32 pm || Up

        That poor bastard has to watch the A’s play everyday…he deserves to have to some fun.

        But seriously, folks...
  84. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:27 pm

    Most of my friends are Rams, Chiefs, or 49ers fans and I’m getting sold on all three teams…I’m leaning towards the Houston Oilers though.

    But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:31 pm || Up

      They’d never leave you. Also they have a catchy song.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Bed Jun 6,2017 9:33 pm || Up

        Warren Moon did throw a pretty ball.

        But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:31 pm || Up

      No epic poem, though.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Bed Jun 6,2017 9:34 pm || Up

        The Summer Wind is an Oiler.

        But seriously, folks...
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:39 pm || Up

          “No, those are just natural gas flares”

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 9:37 pm || Up

      All time great color scheme/logo combination.

    • nevermoor Jun 12,2017 9:58 am || Up

      Well, if you want to live in 1991 again, the choice is clear. Niners!

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  85. Future Ed Jun 6,2017 9:32 pm
    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Soaker Jun 6,2017 9:42 pm || Up

      Skimming the Instagram thing, if that’s the basis for an investigation it is pretty flimsy.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 9:50 pm || Up

        as i recall, she was a body builder, yeah?

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
  86. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:36 pm

    So, teams sign their core players and keep them…what is this witchcraft you speak of?

    But seriously, folks...
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:42 pm || Up

      Toronto’s a reasonable comp. They play in a wealthy area yet at times over the years have chosen to act like a poorer team, and bemoaned the fickle local fans. Now they invest in payroll and contend.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  87. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:38 pm

    In comes the man with multiple names.

    But seriously, folks...
  88. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:39 pm

    If I became a Los Angeles Chargers fan the great thing about that is I’d be the only one.

    But seriously, folks...
  89. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:41 pm

    Bob Melvin. “I believe in you, Ryon…now take a seat.” Fuck off, Bob.

    But seriously, folks...
  90. Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 9:42 pm

    “Defense doesn’t really go in slumps.”

    Coulda fooled me with this team, Mark

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 6,2017 9:46 pm || Up

      It’s not a slump if your everyday baseline is hideous.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  91. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:45 pm

    Having a post game with both Shooty and Canseco must be the pinnacle of baseball coverage.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 10:00 pm || Up

      I’m enjoying the Jose Canseco Tank Top Experience.

  92. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:47 pm

    They’re giving Castilla way more credit for being clever than I believe him to be.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Soaker Jun 6,2017 9:48 pm || Up

      IYCDTWB,BTWBS.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 6,2017 9:57 pm || Up

      The name change was pretty clever.

  93. Future Ed Jun 6,2017 9:53 pm

    casilla still hasn’t gotten a new glove

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Future Ed Jun 6,2017 9:55 pm || Up

      am ok with it. i like thrift and not being wasteful

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  94. Bed Jun 6,2017 9:54 pm

    Good win…banana daiquiris for everybody!

    But seriously, folks...
  95. ptbnl Jun 7,2017 8:04 am

    Really? A fishing net?

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  96. Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 11:31 am

    Jesus

    On the morning of March 30, the President called me at the FBI. He described the Russia investigation as “a cloud” that was impairing his ability to act on behalf of the country. He said he had nothing to do with Russia, had not been involved with hookers in Russia, and had always assumed he was being recorded when in Russia. He asked what we could do to “lift the cloud.” I responded that we were investigating the matter as quickly as we could, and that there would be great benefit, if we didn’t find anything, to our having done the work well. He agreed, but then re-emphasized the problems this was causing him.

    • Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 11:34 am || Up

      Uhhhhh

      He said he would do that and added, “Because I have been very loyal to you, very loyal; we had that thing you know.” I did not reply or ask him what he
      meant by “that thing.”

    • dmoas Jun 7,2017 11:51 am || Up

      Unfortunately nothing there is inherently criminal. Dumb and grossly inappropriate, but hard to pin down an actual illegal act. It’s too general.

      • Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 12:34 pm || Up

        You have to look at the overall picture of all of the interactions, and the fact that Trump then fired Comey and admitted he did so because of this investigation.

        More to the point, assessing whether he did anything technically criminal is sort of beside the point. It’s inappropriate for a reason: it’s an abuse of power.

        Anyway, the really crazy shit is Trump bringing up the “hookers” sua sponte, four months after Comey briefed him on the dossier.

        • nevermoor Jun 12,2017 10:00 am || Up

          Only matters if the GOP turns on him. If they support him, he doesn’t get impeached either way. If they don’t, he does either way.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
          • Glorious Mundy Jun 12,2017 10:29 am || Up

            It matters even if they don’t turn on him. The more they are seen as covering for his outrageous behavior, the more chance they get crushed in next year’s election.

            • dmoas Jun 12,2017 10:38 am || Up

              I don’t see a grand shift happening. The polarization has created too much distrust for the middle to be swayed into one side or the other. And people still don’t think their own representative is the problem, but rather all the other representatives.

              • Glorious Mundy Jun 12,2017 10:42 am || Up

                Waves still happen though. There was a lot of distrust in 2006, 2008, and 2010 as well, and that didn’t save the incumbents (though subsequent gerrymanding complicates things).

                • dmoas Jun 12,2017 11:04 am || Up

                  I expect a wave, but I don’t necessarily think it will break the current majorities. At least not in 2018. I’m expecting merely a tightening. All bets are off if undeniable proof is released on Russian collusion though. But I also see that investigation going on through 2018.

                • Glorious Mundy Jun 12,2017 11:14 am || Up

                  Even last year the Democrats picked up six house seats. Their majority is more precarious than it looks.

  97. andeux Jun 7,2017 12:41 pm

    Today’s game is available on MLB-TV, not blacked out. Good consolation while home sick.

    TINSTAAFK
  98. Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 12:43 pm

    They are baseballing already.

  99. Soaker Jun 7,2017 12:49 pm

    I hope the A’s Defence is better than their Defense.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  100. Soaker Jun 7,2017 12:59 pm

    Chris Coghlan owes us a few, and paid one back right there.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 2:17 pm || Up

      Ahahahaha

    • Soaker Jun 7,2017 2:19 pm || Up

      He’s on the rapid debt reduction plan today.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  101. Soaker Jun 7,2017 1:15 pm

    Walks + home runs, this is a good way to get a ticket back to Nashville.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  102. andeux Jun 7,2017 1:15 pm

    Ugh.

    TINSTAAFK
  103. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 7,2017 1:16 pm

    I am ready to conclude that Cotton ain’t ready.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:38 am || Up

      look away, look away, look away, look away

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  104. Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 2:02 pm

    Ploooooouffe

    • Soaker Jun 7,2017 2:14 pm || Up

      I had to run downstairs for a couple minutes and managed to miss Plouffe’s monthly moment of success.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
  105. Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 2:20 pm

    The Blue Jays outfielders have caught Athletics’ Disease.

  106. Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 6:27 pm

    Dammit

  107. Bed Jun 7,2017 6:34 pm

    It’s unfortunate how unstable the site is these days. If there’s anything I can do to help just let me know.

    But seriously, folks...
    • nevermoor Jun 12,2017 10:01 am || Up

      I need to switch hosts, but honestly the research into that is daunting and I don’t want to pay tons of money (our host, for example, would likely be fine at $25/month instead of $5/month.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  108. andeux Jun 7,2017 6:35 pm

    TINSTAAFK
  109. Bed Jun 7,2017 6:37 pm

    I assumed the reason you have a 8 man bullpen is so that someone like Montas would never have to come into an important situation. I’m not even sure Bob is a checkers player at this point…his game might be more Candy Land. I’m starting to understand why he’s already been fired twice before.

    But seriously, folks...
  110. Bed Jun 7,2017 6:40 pm

    I only caught the last couple of innings of the game. The Blue Jays announcers both sounded exactly alike and they’re over the top homers…I’ll take Glen and Ray.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:40 am || Up

      radio guys are treasures, tv? meh

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 8:46 am || Up

        Buck Martinez isn’t terrible, but he has a pretty terrible voice.

  111. Bed Jun 7,2017 6:49 pm

    I only caught the last couple minutes of the news. The American President and Vice President both sound exactly alike and they’re over the top homers…I’ll take Glen and Ray.

    But seriously, folks...
  112. Bed Jun 7,2017 6:52 pm

    My prediction for the James Comey hearings tomorrow is that he ends his testimony with a musical number.

    But seriously, folks...
    • ptbnl Jun 7,2017 7:44 pm || Up

      In The Air Tonight?

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
      • AV Jun 7,2017 7:48 pm || Up

        now i’m really looking forward to the air drum solo.

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
        • ptbnl Jun 8,2017 7:57 pm || Up

          Such a disappointment.

          If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
          • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:25 pm || Up

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:25 pm || Up

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:25 pm || Up

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:25 pm || Up

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:25 pm || Up

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • AV Jun 8,2017 11:20 pm || Up

            it got close!

            i can feel it
            coming in the air
            to-night…

            oh lordy.

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  113. Bed Jun 7,2017 6:53 pm

    So, in conclusion…it was Colonel Mustard, in the library, with a revolver.

    But seriously, folks...
  114. Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 8:30 pm

    Good basketball game

    • Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 8:50 pm || Up

      I don’t understand how the Warriors won that.

      • AV Jun 7,2017 8:52 pm || Up

        snagged it.

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
        • ptbnl Jun 7,2017 8:53 pm || Up

          15-0

          If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
          • MikeV Jun 7,2017 10:37 pm || Up

            Klay is 30-0 since he signed that toaster.

            And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

            Thanks, and go As.

      • dmoas Jun 7,2017 11:04 pm || Up

        That was incredibly odd. He hit that three and the Cavs seem to quit.

        • MikeV Jun 7,2017 11:42 pm || Up

          They just took everything Cleveland had, and then with a few minutes left said OK time to end it.

          That was just completely fucking demoralizing. I love it.

          And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

          Thanks, and go As.

  115. doctorK Jun 7,2017 8:57 pm

    KD!!!!!!!

    I love a silent Q.

    • Glorious Mundy Jun 7,2017 8:59 pm || Up

      Silent Jeff Van Gundy is nice too.

      • doctorK Jun 7,2017 9:34 pm || Up

        /sarcasm on

        It was nice to see how unbiased they were, and how they weren’t rooting for one team over another.

        /sarcasm off

  116. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 8:48 am

    Yay Democracy

    • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 8:51 am || Up

      why doe they expect repayment? don’t they know who they are doing a solid for?

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • dmoas Jun 8,2017 10:00 am || Up

        Yeah, I don’t think they seem to realize that Little D think *HE* is the one doing THEM a favor. So any expectation of quid pro quo is lunacy.

  117. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 9:00 am

    Why is Joe Manchin?

    • colin Jun 8,2017 12:50 pm || Up

      because West Virginia

      I mean, he sucks but he is still obviously better than the Republican alternative

      • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 3:22 pm || Up

        I don’t begrudge him being a conservative-ish Democrat, but he asked the dumbest question of the day, non McCain division: “If Hillary Clinton had won the election, do you think you would have been fired?”

        • nevermoor Jun 12,2017 10:31 am || Up

          I’ll forgive him anything until and unless he pulls a Nelson on something as important as the ACA.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
          • Glorious Mundy Jun 12,2017 10:45 am || Up

            The weirdest thing about the Republican legislative strategy this year is that they have done nothing at all to create tough votes for Manchin, Heitkamp, Donnelly, McCaskill, Tester, etc.

            They can vote against the AHCA with no problem given where it is polling, and McConnell hasn’t even attempted to bring them in as bipartisan cover. In fact, he won’t even show them the bill or hold a damn hearing on it! Easiest “nay” ever.

          • andeux Jun 12,2017 11:03 am || Up

            He voted to confirm Jeff FKing Sessions.

            As a practical matter, sure, his vote there wasn’t the difference maker, plus someone more progressive couldn’t even win a Democratic primary in WVa, let alone a general election.

            But as a measure of his judgment, that’s still as awful a vote as I can imagine.

            TINSTAAFK
            • Glorious Mundy Jun 12,2017 11:16 am || Up

              I think that was a reflection of West Virginia democrats being pretty cool with racism, but generally hostile to the GOP economic agenda.

            • nevermoor Jun 12,2017 5:25 pm || Up

              Again, I’m ok with whatever pandering/non-decisive action he thinks he needs to keep the seat blue. Until and unless he single-handedly hijacks major legislation.

              "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
              • Glorious Mundy Jun 12,2017 5:32 pm || Up

                So you mean after the Democrats win the Senate back?

                • nevermoor Jun 14,2017 3:22 pm || Up

                  Right, which we won’t do unless we have some blue dogs.

                  "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  118. Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:13 am

    kamala, I don’t think you ever tried a case as high as robbery

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  119. Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:17 am

    she is better than many of these dicks, but I can think of dozens of attorneys that wold be better at questioning.

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 9:23 am || Up

      I don’t know how good a prosecutor she was, but she does seem to be a pretty good politician.

      • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:26 am || Up

        yes, she is very corrupt.

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:29 am || Up
        I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 9:25 am || Up

      It’s fairly amazing how bad some of these Republican senators are at this.

      • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:32 am || Up

        very very bad

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
        • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 9:40 am || Up

          Every one of them at some point asked a question that got Comey to say something terrible for them.

          • andeux Jun 8,2017 10:10 am || Up

            Too bad nothing that anyone says or does seems to matter any more.

            TINSTAAFK
            • Bed Jun 8,2017 2:12 pm || Up

              This pretty much sums it up.

              But seriously, folks...
      • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:33 am || Up

        I don’t know how much experience he has as a witness, but this is a cakewalk compared to many direct and cross examination

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • MikeV Jun 8,2017 1:10 pm || Up

        McCain is unfit to be in a position of leadership. The man couldn’t even put together coherent sentences.

        And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

        Thanks, and go As.

        • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 8,2017 1:52 pm || Up

          It has not been my impression lately that coherence is a prerequisite for leadership in this country.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 4:03 pm || Up

      Seems like this was part of what she was driving at.

  120. AV Jun 8,2017 9:25 am

    the live comments on the live FB feed are at about the level of the live comments on a pirated live feed of an international club soccer game.

    her emails.. JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA!!!!!!!

    (please note the two-period ellipses.)

    *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  121. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 9:33 am

    Jesus Christ, McCain…the hell happened to you?

    • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 9:35 am || Up

      Seriously, is he OK? I can’t even follow what he’s talking about.

      • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:38 am || Up

        seriously, I think he has a pee tape as weel

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:43 am || Up

        I have $5. No I don\'t.
        • dmoas Jun 8,2017 10:03 am || Up

          Did it get stuck in your teeth? Mine always get stuck in my teeth. Did you ever lose a filling from it?

    • Future Ed Jun 8,2017 9:35 am || Up

      it’s very important to get to the bottom of this vince foster thing

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 12:04 pm || Up

      Uh huh

  122. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 12:02 pm

    Eric Sogard is batting .407/.536/.630

    Don’t normalize this.

  123. andeux Jun 8,2017 1:30 pm
    TINSTAAFK
  124. Bed Jun 8,2017 2:14 pm

    80 year old Senators, 70 year old Presidents, 113 year old Supreme Court Justices…dear old people it’s okay to retire.

    But seriously, folks...
  125. lenscrafters Jun 8,2017 2:16 pm

    We won the trade?

    In all seriousness, if true, this is supremely shitty. Derek Norris is also facing similar allegations.

  126. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 2:35 pm

    The British news media sure are willing to speculate and recriminate based on nothing but an exit poll.

  127. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 3:07 pm

    Announcing the vote counts in each constituency live, with the candidates on the stage, is A+

    • AV Jun 8,2017 4:14 pm || Up

      how did tarquin fin-tim-lin-bin-whin-bim-lim-bus-stop-f’tang-f’tang-olé-biscuitbarrel do??

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • andeux Jun 8,2017 5:02 pm || Up

        He’s running neck and neck with Mr. Hilter.

        TINSTAAFK
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 5:42 pm || Up

      “Tooting” is my favorite constituency

    • ptbnl Jun 8,2017 8:13 pm || Up

      Unless things are *really* close, they already know the result.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  128. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 3:25 pm

    Thing that has always annoyed me: The “first past the post” metaphor makes no sense.

  129. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 8,2017 3:31 pm

    Honestly, if I was going to run pantsless onto a ballfield after a Giant I’d head for Brandon Crawford too.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  130. Soaker Jun 8,2017 5:47 pm

    Yay Florida! I will try to stay out of the Weird News stories for a week. (“Oakland A’s third baseman Trevor Plouffe and a fat little man identified only as ‘Soaker’ were arrested last night several hours after the Rays game against the A’s…”)

    Actually, it’s a beautiful evening. St. Pete is a little like Eugene, OR, albeit somewhat bigger, some neat downtown bar and dining areas, mostly low-rise buildings and a strangely out-of-scale stadium. I had outdoor dinner at a brewpub about a mile west of the Trop and was encouraged by the “St. Pete Pride” rainbow banners hanging from the street light poles. Don’t know what Anita would make of that. Also, it was an optimistic sign that while I was in Publix buying beach beer for tomorrow, “Celebration” played on the sound system.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 8,2017 6:14 pm || Up

      Lure Plouffe with craft brew then set him adrift. Celebration was a sign to do this.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  131. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 6:21 pm

    Pulisic

  132. Future Ed Jun 8,2017 6:56 pm
    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  133. FreeSeatUpgrade Jun 8,2017 6:56 pm

    Hard not to despair that the Penguins will again take the Cup.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  134. Glorious Mundy Jun 8,2017 6:56 pm

  135. ptbnl Jun 8,2017 11:39 pm

    Jerry Adams easily walks away with the award for the best party leader’s election night socks.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  136. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:22 am

    Three day weekend and you know what that means…Macrame!

    But seriously, folks...
  137. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:24 am

    The 90’s were a simpler time when a fella could get together with his buddies and go out in the backyard and Vogue.

    But seriously, folks...
  138. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:27 am

    I tell you what my Twitter feed is just blowing up right now and you can follow me at @jimbakker where you can join me as we do the Lord’s work.

    But seriously, folks...
  139. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:28 am

    Is your life in a rut? Do what I did…fake your own death and join the Merchant Marines.

    But seriously, folks...
  140. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:37 am

    Indian Jones and the Catheter of Doom

    Indiana Jones and Early Onset Alzheimers

    Indiana Jones and the Curse of Those Damn Kids Who Won’t Get Off His Lawn

    Indiana Jones and Harrison Ford Needs the Paycheck Because He Crashed Another Plane

    Indiana Jones and The Elders Getting Lost at the Park

    But seriously, folks...
  141. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:38 am

    Have Morgan Freeman and Morgan Fairchild ever been seen in the same place? I think not proving my Single Morgan Theory.

    But seriously, folks...
    • Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 9:19 am || Up

      Ditto Joe Morgan and Morganna the Kissing Bandit

  142. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:42 am

    What’s the way to a better life? Simple, screw over the other guy before he screws you over.

    But seriously, folks...
  143. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:48 am

    For those keeping score at home I’m thinking about growing out my vacation beard early. I’ll make sure to keep everyone updated through the entire process on my Instagram page.

    But seriously, folks...
  144. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:49 am

    I feel like if the A’s started the game right now they’d catch the Rays off-guard.

    But seriously, folks...
  145. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:51 am

    Don’t Blame Me I Voted For Tony Blair.

    But seriously, folks...
    • ptbnl Jun 9,2017 8:54 am || Up

      Now you’ve gone too far.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  146. Bed Jun 9,2017 8:54 am

    You know I was thinking…I bet one of the reasons the site’s been a bit dodgy lately is because of Snapperhead’s posting random nonsense and overtaxing the site.

    But seriously, folks...
  147. Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 9:33 am

    I love a historical counterfactual as much as anyone, but I’m really having trouble following the logic of the “Corbyn’s loss proves that Bernie would have beaten Trump” hot take.

    • AV Jun 9,2017 10:01 am || Up

      does this help?

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 10:13 am || Up

        I think that one went around a few years ago. It broke my brain to the point that I refuse to engage with it this time.

        • AV Jun 9,2017 3:25 pm || Up

          not an exact correlation, but saying corbyn’s loss proves bernie woulda beaten trump, as soon as you have that lined up, ie, having bernie be president of the US, the other thing falls apart, the (rational? fearful?) swing away from conservatism that trump causes in the middle voters, even if in another country.

          *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
          • Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 3:27 pm || Up

            I’m picturing an alternative universe where May held hands with Bernie and won a huge majority while Le Pen took over France.

            • AV Jun 9,2017 3:39 pm || Up

              bring it. we get single payer, the 1% is paying up, and i’ve already seen the eiffel tower.

              *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • andeux Jun 9,2017 10:31 am || Up

      I was going to post something along the same lines. People who are quick to dismiss Hillary’s large popular vote advantage or Dem gains in special elections as meaningless (fair enough…) seem awfully excited about Corbyn … exceeding expectations? forcing the Tories into a coalition with a far-right Irish party?

      Closest I can find to actual logic are the observations that
      a) a lot more young people voted in UK than in US
      b) if more young people had voted in US, the Dems would win.
      These are both true, in and of themselves.
      But you have to make a bunch of huge assumptions in order to draw any real conclusions from that.

      TINSTAAFK
      • dmoas Jun 9,2017 11:18 am || Up

        I don’t really understand their politics, but as far as I can grasp is that it would be like the Republicans falling short of control so they make a deal with the Tea Party to remain in power. If so, that may not be an outcome anyone actually wants and our fucked up system is proof of that idiocy.

      • Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 11:47 am || Up

        I think there’s a plausible lesson that a party led by a true leftist won’t necessarily collapse in support. But it’s not really evidence that it can win, or even that it would do better than a party led by a center-left type.

        • ptbnl Jun 9,2017 11:59 am || Up

          People are definitely getting over-excited, but I think it’s a bit more than “won’t necessarily collapse in support”.

          At the start of the election (on the back of a dismal Brexit performance by Labour as a whole) the Tories were 20 points ahead and everyone was predicting a landslide. A combination of a strong populist Labour campaign and a weak unpopulist Tory campaign turned that into a 2 point deficit in the popular vote, though thanks to judicious districting that’s a 9 point difference in seats. I don’t think a center-left party carrying the stench of Blair could have done that – it just wouldn’t have energized key demographics in the way Corbyn did.

          If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
          • Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 12:02 pm || Up

            Point taken, but there’s a lot of UK specific stuff there that makes drawing any US lessons pretty dicey.

            • ptbnl Jun 9,2017 12:08 pm || Up

              Absolutely! From the differences in the Blair and Clinton baggage to the respective histories of socialism.

              If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
              • Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 12:10 pm || Up

                Exactly the two things I was thinking of (especially since our Blair equivalent is Bush). Also, snap elections just seem like a different animal than anything we have.

              • andeux Jun 9,2017 2:06 pm || Up

                Also, the conservative in the UK and the center-leftist in the US who saw their support erode were both women, which maybe is an argument in favor of Bernie, but not one that anyone should really want to make.

                TINSTAAFK
                • ptbnl Jun 9,2017 2:29 pm || Up

                  Though in the UK you’re voting for your local MP, so May was only named on the ballot in one constituency (which she very comfortably won).

                  The key dynamics as far as I can tell were the surge in young voter registration, the asymmetric collapse of the UKIP vote, and the complicated Independence/Brexit dynamic in Scotland – only one of which is relevant for the US.

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • andeux Jun 9,2017 2:49 pm || Up

                  Sure, but if you’re making the argument that the party leader isn’t important because they’re not the one on the ballot, then it also kills the entire theory of Corbyn as difference maker (unless there were a wave of rookie socialist Labour candidates who were swept into office, which seems unlikely in a snap election).

                  (I’m not really arguing with you, as I think we mostly both agree with GM’s original point.)

                  TINSTAAFK
    • Future Ed Jun 9,2017 2:06 pm || Up

      talk about people who are not over an election

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  148. Glorious Mundy Jun 9,2017 12:16 pm

    LET’S DO THIS

    • ptbnl Jun 9,2017 12:24 pm || Up

      Lordy yes!

      The lines of questioning would be fantastic. There are so many things he’s said that are demonstrably false. You could just wheel them out one after another after another, and each time ask him to either reaffirm them and lie in the present, or refute them and acknowledge habitual lying in the past.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • dmoas Jun 9,2017 12:32 pm || Up

      Oh please. He’ll find an excuse to back out of it.

      • ptbnl Jun 9,2017 12:35 pm || Up

        He probably thinks he could take the oath, answer a single question, and leave.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • Future Ed Jun 9,2017 2:10 pm || Up

          i have sad this before, but, yes, this. just like one of my client.

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • AV Jun 10,2017 8:20 am || Up

            this morning, maybe because i’m still under that double dose of melatonin i had to resort to last night, i’m finding more humor out of you guys thinking he couldn’t than him thinking he could.

            remember the health release? same thing.

            reality show stage, retired former — say, divorce court — judge, a sealed envelope containing a single sheet of pre-typed testimony, the judge opens it, reads it to himself, declares trump to be in the truthfuliest condition he’s ever been in his life, conway et al standing in wings cheer and clap, roll credits.

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.

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