The Grill of the Second Week ← FREE KRAUT!

The Grill of the Second Week 451

An open letter to all of my colleagues:

It’s called the HOME opener because the team is at HOME.  That team’s HOME is 2.3 miles from our office.  So if you’re really a fan of that team, why aren’t you there (or at least somewhere nearby), instead of making me watch your goddamned fool broadcasters on the TV at WORK?

Besides, for all the slobbering that local hacks do over your stupid ballpark, it is NOT the ballpark that is the home of the Bloody Mary garnished with a slice of cold pizza.  You fail again!

 

 

 

451 thoughts on “The Grill of the Second Week

  1. doctorK Apr 13,2015 1:49 pm

    Kawakami’s presence at the Merky news really makes me question why I still subscribe.

    • Glorious Mundy Apr 13,2015 2:27 pm || Up

      That interview is really gross.

    • Englishmajor Apr 13,2015 2:30 pm || Up

      Every now and then he has an insight worth sharing, but he would benefit from an editor to slap him upside the head repeatedly. Unfortunately, the Merc seems to have allowed him to hit the publish button on his own.

  2. Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 13,2015 2:08 pm

    As a fan of both Bloody Mary’s (Maries? Marys?) and pizza, I approve of that drink

  3. Englishmajor Apr 13,2015 2:36 pm

    I initially started to retch when I saw the season opening of HBO’s Silicon Valley — it’s set at AT&T — but it turned out to be fairly amusing, depicting the Gnats whoring themselves out to venture capitalists, and the tech bros who the VCs are trying to court not giving a shit. Even more entertaining: the number of Giants fans on Twitter who thought it was AWESOME.

    • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 5:09 pm || Up

      I am betting a lot of the writers are dodgers fans

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Thunderbutt Apr 13,2015 5:50 pm || Up

        Could be. They might also just be decent human beings, I suppose.

        There is always a score.
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 13,2015 8:24 pm || Up

      This episode was full of people not understanding that the joke was on them.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  4. batgirl Apr 13,2015 3:22 pm

    Going to my first concert in what must be 10 years tonight. Was expecting that the opener would be some band I’ve ever heard of since I’m woefully out of touch. To my delight, it’s John Doe. Now if only it was an outdoor show at about 2 in the afternoon, no more than 5 blocks from my house, we’d really be on to something!

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 13,2015 8:25 pm || Up

      Nice, love John Doe, the sober ying to Exene’s raging yang.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • batgirl Apr 14,2015 9:55 am || Up

        He was soooooo good! They did some X songs too. It was only marred by the fact that the guy next to us would not stop talking to my friend during their set. It was so annoying. The guy comes with a date and then insists on talking to my friend. Such an ass. Thankfully during the Replacement’s set one of the lesbians in the row ahead of us took her top off while dancing, so that shut him up toot suite.

        • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 14,2015 11:03 am || Up

          Damn, I gotta get out to more shows!

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
          • Jennifer Apr 15,2015 12:52 am || Up

            You wanna hang out with me and the hitchhiker? Michigan this weekend!

            • 5Aces Apr 15,2015 3:01 pm || Up

              So, youre saying you will be topless at some point?

              Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
              • Jennifer Apr 15,2015 5:19 pm || Up

                Not for the hitchhiker. FSU? Meh. Maybe.

                • MikeV Apr 15,2015 11:03 pm || Up

                  hi.

                  And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                  Thanks, and go As.

        • doctorK Apr 15,2015 8:17 am || Up

          If some asshat is yapping away next to me during a show, I’m not sure what I’d do – either kiss or kill.

    • AV Apr 13,2015 9:08 pm || Up

      did they finally figure out who it was?

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • sslinger Apr 13,2015 10:39 pm || Up

      Nice way of casually mentioning you’re at the REPLACEMENTS show.

      • batgirl Apr 14,2015 9:57 am || Up

        Haha! I had never been to the Masonic before. It is great! Love the horseshoe shape of the seating and that cool stained glass when you come in the main door.

  5. doctorK Apr 13,2015 4:41 pm

    Raise the flag, then get shut out … by the Rockies.

    I wonder how many Panda hats were in attendance today.

    • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 5:10 pm || Up

      being offered at $10 at the friday pre season game

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
  6. doctorK Apr 13,2015 4:45 pm

    Ooh – Tonight’s Skanks/O’s game is a HATEFEST

    “Chris Young homers on a line drive to left-center field”
    “Manny Machado doubles on a sharp ground ball to left fielder Brett Gardner, deflected by third baseman Alex Rodriguez”

  7. Glorious Mundy Apr 13,2015 4:57 pm

    We’re now just sticking total randos next to Vince.

      • Glorious Mundy Apr 13,2015 5:06 pm || Up

        According to his twitter profile:

        TX resident, Iowa native. MLB Announcer currently w/o portfolio. FB/Bask nut . Find me on ESPN3 & U, ASN, CSN & SR610. So-so BP pitcher for 13 year olds.

        • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 13,2015 8:26 pm || Up

          What the hell is a Bask nut?

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
          • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 8:30 pm || Up

            Spanish separatist?

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • AV Apr 13,2015 8:40 pm || Up

            zonker harris, working up the ranks to professional tanner.

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • Glorious Mundy Apr 13,2015 5:10 pm || Up

        Hmmm, he’s a former Astros PBP guy.

        • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 5:18 pm || Up

          what about vince?

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Glorious Mundy Apr 13,2015 5:20 pm || Up

            Maybe we can get dueling Milo Hamilton impressions.

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 13,2015 9:00 pm || Up

      Wait wait wait, Cotroneo’s Twitter handle is @vincebaseball? That is incredibly lame, in a very specific, difficult to describe but you know it when you see it kinda lameness, like giving yourself a nickname that serves only to illustrate how truly lame you are. Damn, that’s really bad. I am embarrassed for him.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  8. Englishmajor Apr 13,2015 5:11 pm

    The Twins are 1 and 6, losing their home opener today to the Royals by the score of 12-3. The only game they’ve won was pitched by the #5 starter we traded them last year, prompting this witticism:

    • colin Apr 13,2015 7:10 pm || Up

      I didn’t make it to the Twins home opener because it was at 3pm and I was still in meetings. I’m flying back to Boston tomorrow, so no Twins baseball for me.

      • Englishmajor Apr 13,2015 7:28 pm || Up

        That’s a shame. Target Field is worth seeing, even when the Twins are not.

        • colin Apr 13,2015 7:32 pm || Up

          I did go to a game there once before, in the first year after it opened.

          • Englishmajor Apr 13,2015 7:38 pm || Up

            Oh well, that’s all right then. Have you had anything good to eat?

            • colin Apr 13,2015 7:51 pm || Up

              I went yesterday to a new Surly Taproom near the the university, then I went to see Caribou playing at First Avenue. Just had some decent pizza from Punch tonight. And back on Friday I got completely obliterated at Palmer’s, which is pretty high on my list of all-time favorite bars.

              • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 7:54 pm || Up

                Did you get to Cheetos or the electric fetus or northern lights?

                I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • colin Apr 13,2015 8:02 pm || Up

                  no. Also, I don’t know what those are. Punk bars?

                • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 8:04 pm || Up

                  Record stores. Maybe extinct

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • Englishmajor Apr 13,2015 8:14 pm || Up

                  The Fetus is as electric as it ever was, not sure about the others.

                • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 8:15 pm || Up

                  Leaveno tern unstoned

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • sslinger Apr 13,2015 10:43 pm || Up
                • Englishmajor Apr 20,2015 4:19 pm || Up

                  Indeed:

      • ptbnl Apr 13,2015 7:29 pm || Up

        Couldn’t you tell Clem you had to go see a man about a tree-house?

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • colin Apr 13,2015 7:32 pm || Up

          Oh man, I would probably be dead now but it would have been worth it.

  9. FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 13,2015 8:23 pm

    From an email I got today from a friend:

    “Went to the store today.

    SÖGARD Dining Room Set

    ZOBRIST Bedroom Collection

    VÖGT Shelving Solutions

    CANHÂ Sofa & Loveseat Set

    PHEGLEY Lighting & Ambience Series

    LADENDORF Blankets & Throws

    FÜLD Towels & Linens

    GENTRY Coffee & Side Tables

    BUTLER Storage Boxes & Baskets

    IKE Bookcases

    Our 2015 IkeA’s”

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • Future Ed Apr 13,2015 8:31 pm || Up

      Get that person an account

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Kay Temple Kirk Apr 14,2015 8:04 am || Up

        , before their charge card bills put them in an early GRAVEMAN.

        \"Weren\'t you already aware the Kay is already writing everyone\'s story? We\'re all just characters who believe we are real. Things make more sense now, don\'t they. Be honest.\"- DMOAS
    • Englishmajor Apr 14,2015 1:39 pm || Up

      Awesome.

  10. James V. Apr 14,2015 9:59 am
  11. Glorious Mundy Apr 14,2015 10:57 am

    Down as I am on college athletics, I’ll admit to being pretty excited to watch Oakland’s Ivan Rabb play in Berkeley next season (and then wish him a fond farewell and good earnings).

    • Glorious Mundy Apr 14,2015 11:04 am || Up

      Apparently this is his mom’s restaurant, where he made the announcement. Looks like a pretty cool place, funny name aside.

  12. 5Aces Apr 14,2015 9:15 pm

    So the Grizzlies have a guy on the team named Preston Tucker. This will kill me all season because I am the only one with the combo of old/dorky/baseball fan to want them to do a promotion for him:

    #HoldThatTiger

    Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
  13. doctorK Apr 15,2015 8:30 am
  14. AV Apr 15,2015 8:33 am
    *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • dmoas Apr 15,2015 8:58 am || Up

      If the car can’t see you, then it’s kind of hard for them to stop from running you over. And the whole point of paved roads was for vehicles to run through quicker. People, horses, horse-drawn carriages, and bikes, by and large, don’t *need* roads to travel on and never had. And today, roads are just currently the only option for bikes in major cities besides sidewalks which come with their own hazards. Honestly the entire argument is a major whine fest. I’m not anti-bike and I don’t disagree that there needs to be genuine concessions to make bike safety *from* cars a priority. But let’s not be naive about it either.

  15. Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 10:25 am

    Oh yeah? Well I’m not too excited about your article!

    • andeux Apr 15,2015 10:29 am || Up

      How dare you disagree with KATOH, whatever that is.

      TINSTAAFK
      • vignette17 Apr 15,2015 11:41 am || Up

        I think it’s basically a statistical system that uses MiLB data to project prospects’ chances. And yeah, there aren’t a lot of 26 year old 1b who set the world on fire. But maybe there can(ha) be one.

        • Future Ed Apr 15,2015 12:08 pm || Up
          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • colin Apr 16,2015 5:51 am || Up

            I think that Shelton is exactly the type of player that KATOH has in mind when it sees Canha. His entire major league career was 4 WAR in a couple seasons worth of PA spread out over five years.

    • Thunderbutt Apr 15,2015 10:33 am || Up

      This is obviously a teeny tiny sample, and we all know better than to read too much into seven games.

      Ha! Sez you.

      There is always a score.
    • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 15,2015 10:53 am || Up

      Seems most of the comments agree with you

  16. Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 11:01 am

    Poor JD having to play on that crap.

    • dmoas Apr 15,2015 4:17 pm || Up

      Only a couple more years and it’ll be grass.

  17. Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 11:07 am

    Yo Soaker: How much are you enjoying the right wing conspiracy theories on what happened to Harry Reid’s face? I’m enjoying them quite a bit myself.

  18. Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 11:12 am

    Wait, we’re seriously allowing this?

    • andeux Apr 15,2015 11:16 am || Up

      Try that against Vogt and he’ll get called for traveling.

      TINSTAAFK
    • Future Ed Apr 15,2015 12:10 pm || Up

      I never understood how you get away with the smacking the ball in the glove before you deliver out of the stretch like I think john rocker used to do and ryan cook I think does

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • nevermoor Apr 15,2015 12:32 pm || Up

        There are exceptions to the balk rule that just kind of happen when it’s something you do 100% of the time (which always struck me as generally non-objectionable because they aren’t really deceptive). This, however, is pitching from 55′, which shouldn’t be allowed.

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
        • dmoas Apr 15,2015 4:19 pm || Up

          I disagree on non-objectionable. Balking on every pitch is still balking on every pitch.

          • nevermoor Apr 15,2015 4:27 pm || Up

            But the reason we don’t allow balks is to avoid unfair advantages in the running game. Those set/consistent deliveries don’t really connect to that reasoning.

            That said, reasonable minds can certainly differ.

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
            • dmoas Apr 15,2015 5:12 pm || Up

              For me all it takes is just a slight difference and you’re causing confusion. Do we count the number of pumps/rocks each time? What happens if the runner leaves while the rocking, etc. is going on causing the pitcher to stop? There’s too much ambiguity over intent. The best course is simply to follow the rules in place and not allow it at all so there’s no argument or confusion.

    • dmoas Apr 15,2015 4:18 pm || Up

      Fuck it, if that’s allowed them so is running up to the catcher’s glove and sticking it in like skeeball.

      • Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 4:29 pm || Up

        That’s not how you’re supposed to play skeeball, cheater.

        • dmoas Apr 15,2015 5:12 pm || Up

          My point exactly ;)

        • batgirl Apr 16,2015 2:01 pm || Up

          If I ever win the lottery, I’m totally putting a skeeball machine in my living room.

          • dmoas Apr 16,2015 2:19 pm || Up

            If you even win the lottery, I’m totally going to your place so I can cheat at the skeeball in your living room.

            • batgirl Apr 16,2015 2:27 pm || Up

              OK but I’m setting the machine so you don’t get any tickets to use at the prize counter.

              • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 6:30 pm || Up

                I played skeeball recently at the Boardwalk and its just as fun as I remember except holy crap are the prizes crappy.

                • batgirl Apr 17,2015 10:30 am || Up

                  When I was a kid, my brother and I would spend every Friday night with my grandma and grandpa so my parents could have an adult evening alone. We had the same routine every week. Friday after school we picked up her dog from the groomer and then went to Dunkin Donuts. At night we watched Dukes of Hazzard. On Saturday she took us to The North Pole. I was too short to ride “The Witches Brew” so while my brother and grandma rode it each weekend, I played skeeball. I saved all my tickets one summer and at the end of summer I carefully chose my prizes: a turquoise blue rabbits foot keychain, a small plastic figurine of a bull covered in purple flocking, and a two-foot yellow comb.

                • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 17,2015 11:24 am || Up

                  That is an awesome story. Do you still have any of those items? I remember those huge combs well.

                  "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
                • batgirl Apr 17,2015 11:39 am || Up

                  I don’t :( I wish I had that comb!!!

    • James V. Apr 15,2015 4:43 pm || Up

      It’s worse than what Walden’s done. MLB actually told Capps only to lessen the hop, basically. That’s it.

  19. Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 1:32 pm

    I enjoyed this clip package from last night’s Mets-Phillies game for the way the editor immediately followed up Anthony Recker: Pinch Runner with a shot of a confused looking Bob Geren.

    • andeux Apr 15,2015 1:39 pm || Up

      I was at a game where Geren used Landon Powell as a pinch runner.

      TINSTAAFK
    • James V. Apr 15,2015 4:44 pm || Up

      To be fair, a confused-looking Bob Geren is rather natural.

  20. Englishmajor Apr 15,2015 5:06 pm

    If only karma was always this swift:

    A driver tried to throw a cigarette butt from her car in (suburban Minneapolis) Dakota County on Wednesday, only to have it return through a window and start the car on fire. The Eagan Fire Department responded about 1:30 p.m. to a report of a grass and car fire on westbound Interstate 494 near Minnesota 13 and found a Subaru Forester engulfed in flames. The driver suffered minor burns, according to the Eagan Fire Department.

  21. Glorious Mundy Apr 15,2015 10:09 pm

    67 wins for the Warriors. Never thought I’d live to see the day.

    • elcroata Apr 15,2015 10:32 pm || Up

      Wins: the Warriors or the A’s?

      Because survival is insufficient
      • Thunderbutt Apr 15,2015 10:40 pm || Up

        Bite your tongue!

        There is always a score.
      • 5Aces Apr 15,2015 11:03 pm || Up

        Including the playoffs?

        Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
        • elcroata Apr 15,2015 11:16 pm || Up

          Yes. So the top possible value for the Warriors is 83.

          Because survival is insufficient
          • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 10:56 am || Up

            Tough call! The A’s preseason over/under was around 81 – that may have gone up a tick now, but let’s say 80-83 is likely range. The Warriors right now are about even money to win the West and 2 to 1 to win it all. I’d put their expected wins around 81 (hard to see them getting swept in the Finals if they make it there).

            I’ll take the A’s, but it’s close.

            • vignette17 Apr 16,2015 3:45 pm || Up

              The Spurs are looming in the WCF. That’s a scary match up.

              • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 3:50 pm || Up

                Very scary. I’m hoping the Clippers or the Rockets take them out early. There was a moment last night where it looked like they might end up on our side of the bracket and I was sweating.

      • vignette17 Apr 16,2015 9:05 am || Up

        Psh. The A’s will have a higher winning percentage. They only need to go 129-23 the rest of the way.

      • elcroata May 8,2015 1:55 am || Up

        Please, place your bets NOW.

        Because survival is insufficient
        • vignette17 May 8,2015 9:56 am || Up

          To beat the winning %, the A’s only need to go 121-11. Or an 11 game win streak for every loss. We got this.

          (I still think the A’s best 67 wins by a long shot).

        • Glorious Mundy May 8,2015 10:10 am || Up

          I’d still take the A’s by a nose. The Warriors are capped at 83, and they’re probably a little less than a coin flip to reach that number. BP projects the A’s for only 79, but there’s more potential there.

          • nevermoor May 8,2015 10:49 am || Up

            Of course, I bet BP’s projection assumes our bullpen lack-of-clutch is meaningless noise.

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • elcroata Apr 16,2015 9:10 am || Up

      Because survival is insufficient
      • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 10:43 am || Up

        This guy is too good to be true.

        • dmoas Apr 16,2015 10:56 am || Up

          It’s totally fake. There’s no guy named Tom “Friend.” If you’re going to come up with a fictitious reporter, you’ve got to come up with a better name than that.

  22. Future Ed Apr 16,2015 12:22 pm

    no game? WTF?

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • colin Apr 16,2015 12:35 pm || Up

      There is an A’s game playing in my mind… and that game is full of Sam Fuld triples!

      • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 1:32 pm || Up

        As I recall, Sam Fuld triples are what Kubrick’s 2001 monolith was full of.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • colin Apr 16,2015 2:11 pm || Up

          Sam Fuld triples are what’s in the trunk of the ’64 Chevy Malibu.

          • Future Ed Apr 16,2015 7:51 pm || Up

            Sam Fuld had a lobotomy in the end

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • dmoas Apr 16,2015 2:20 pm || Up

        Mr. April!!!

    • ptbnl Apr 16,2015 1:09 pm || Up

      Keepin’ our mojo fresh for 7-in-a-row tonight.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
      • ptbnl Apr 16,2015 11:40 pm || Up

        Mojo risin’

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • Future Ed Apr 17,2015 5:26 am || Up

          whats the matter with willy?
          whats the matter with sergie?

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • AV Apr 16,2015 3:24 pm || Up

      don’t act like you’ve never heard of copa bridgestone libertadores.

      two perfect streaks on the line, back to back. boca (15pts/5 games) faces palestino, the small chilean side i left a link about recently. then, at corinthians (12pts/4 games) faces san lorenzo who needs to keep pace with sao paulo, winners last night.

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • AV Apr 16,2015 3:53 pm || Up

        the things you hear during the pregame show sometimes… tevez has signed a pre-contract to come to boca in june. and [calling mr mundy, g mundy to the disbelief counter please] he’s trying to convince pirlo to go with him.

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
        • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 4:20 pm || Up

          Would definitely watch Pirlo’s Argentine Adventure.

          Tevez to Boca…seems like just yesterday he was leaving them for Corinthians. That was a big deal at the time. Lots of people in Brazil were unsettled by a highly paid Argentine tearing up their league.

          • AV Apr 16,2015 6:04 pm || Up

            do you have a brazilian team?

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
            • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 6:07 pm || Up

              Vasco

              • AV Apr 16,2015 6:11 pm || Up

                huh. i gotta imagine you inherited that. not a club that’s super known outside latin america.

                *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 6:23 pm || Up

                  Hey, that’s the third best team in Rio De Janeiro you’re talking about! (Can say that now that they got promoted back to Serie A and Botafogo got relegated.)

                  I had no choice in the matter whatsoever. It’s a tribal thing I signed up for.

                • AV Apr 16,2015 8:41 pm || Up

                  one of, now, three teams in copa america history to go through libertadores groups with all Ws!

                  though eliminated at quarters by the eventual winner.

                  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2001_Copa_Libertadores

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 8:51 pm || Up

                  They won the thing in 1998. That 2001 team featured Romario, I think.

                • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 8:58 pm || Up

                  Speaking of 1998, do you remember this goal? They still sing songs about it.

                • AV Apr 16,2015 9:06 pm || Up

                  nice. never seen it before.

                  those years i was watching mostly italian and mexican soccer on RAI and univision. the internet has definitely made my life better.

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • Glorious Mundy May 8,2015 11:07 am || Up
                • AV May 8,2015 11:35 am || Up

                  felicitaçao! (or the word i mean that i can’t quite spell.)

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
          • AV Apr 16,2015 6:06 pm || Up

            and you missed a chance to alliterate andrea!

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • AV Apr 16,2015 6:02 pm || Up

        boca, 6 Ws for 6 games, with a 19/2 goal difference.

        kinda doubting corinthians can catch up to take the 1 seed, which is nice.

        however, river plate looks like it’s going to hold on to that 16 seed, and that means superclásico at the round of 16, which could be trouble — even though boca is a better team right now, river can always FK ’em up extrafutbolistically and win the round somehow. especially since the regular-tournament superclásico is about the same time.

        the key though? gago. don’t hurt yourself anymore!

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
        • AV Apr 20,2015 8:58 am || Up

          well well well…

          10 weeks into the 30-game tournament, there’re 2 teams tied at 1st. (there was a 4-way tie for first last week, but i didn’t want to brag.) now that the two hanger-ons dropped points though, what this tournament is about is starting to emerge: boca and river.

          AND they meet for their tournament date this coming weekend, with the two copa libertadores legs quickly apace. so (if the front offices of the two teams stop fighting over the dates) we can set our calendars. may 3, 6 (or 7), and 13 (or 14), for three rounds with the heavyweights, and this time every bit of it all counts.

          above, i probably exaggerated a touch about boca’s superiority right now. especially with cavenaghi’s efforts to retain startership. but not by a whole lot, when this is boca, even with gago resting up for the clash. this is rad.

          *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
          • AV May 8,2015 11:46 am || Up

            ugh game last night. 1-0 to river on a penalty in a blocked frictive game.

            zero love was lost.

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
            • nevermoor May 8,2015 12:03 pm || Up

              Don’t get the last one.

              "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
              • AV May 8,2015 12:09 pm || Up

                late hit, cleats up. the angle from across the field shows how late the kick starts compared to when the ball is cleared.

                *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • nevermoor May 8,2015 1:57 pm || Up

                  Got it.

                  "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
                • Glorious Mundy May 8,2015 2:18 pm || Up

                  Enough about Lawrie’s slide already.

            • MikeV May 8,2015 2:41 pm || Up

              Did your brand new high dollar player tear his meniscus effectively ending his season after like 7 games?

              Ours did. :(

              And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

              Thanks, and go As.

            • AV May 9,2015 2:03 pm || Up

              why he’s almost… a fan. harumph!! guess i’m never watching the WC final at this guy’s home again.

              *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  23. Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 6:40 pm

    I’m watching Mets and Marlins and they just cut to a guy in the Marlins dugout wearing a Marlins cap who looks *just* like Ichiro. Weird.

    • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 6:55 pm || Up

      Whoa, there he is again. This dude looks exactly like Ichiro! For a minute I actually thought that Ichiro was on the Marlins, but that would be insane.

      • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 7:06 pm || Up

        Not a bad place to go if you’re hoping to be traded to a contender.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • AV Apr 16,2015 8:43 pm || Up

        oh, he’s actually on the team.

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • Future Ed Apr 16,2015 8:23 pm || Up
      I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • AV Apr 16,2015 8:42 pm || Up

      there’s a fake ichiro guy.

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  24. Jennifer Apr 16,2015 6:42 pm

    This could be the greatest day of my life. I won pre-entry passes to my concert in Michigan. That means me and 29 other people get in 30 minutes before everyone else in line.

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 7:04 pm || Up

      Is it General Admission?

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 7:19 pm || Up

          Nice! Bring in a big blanket and take up a lot of room so you can laugh at the regular people behind you.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
          • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 7:21 pm || Up

            Stand right in front and film the whole thing on the biggest iPad you can find.

  25. Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 6:51 pm

    LOL the Cubs are calling up Kris Bryant on the very first day where he won’t accrue a full year of service time. Very subtle.

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 7:05 pm || Up

      That’s quite a nice fuck you to the union.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • dmoas Apr 17,2015 9:17 am || Up

        Don’t agree to the terms if you don’t like it.

    • MikeV Apr 16,2015 8:16 pm || Up

      Lucky for them Olt broke his hand. Legit excuse.

      And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

      Thanks, and go As.

    • ptbnl Apr 17,2015 2:06 pm || Up

      0-4, 3K, 5 LOB.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  26. FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 7:02 pm

    Only two weeks and two days until the Kentucky Derby!

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 7:03 pm || Up

      Better start juleping the mint!

      • Jennifer Apr 16,2015 7:05 pm || Up

        We’re having a hat contest at work. Thank God I’ll be at a concert.

        • Englishmajor Apr 17,2015 1:59 pm || Up

          We’re having a Derby party at Golden Gate Fields (Golden Gate Fields, Golden, Golden Gate Fiiiieeeelds) but unfortunately I’m going to be out of town.

  27. Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 7:08 pm

    Hey, the hockey playoffs are on! Who am I supposed to hate, Detroit?

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 16,2015 7:26 pm || Up

      Hate Anaheim; always a reasonable default response. Hopefully they’ll get upset by the Winnipeg Jets.

      Absent the Sharks and the Flyers I’m rooting for a Canadian team to win the Cup for teh first time in 20 years. Montreal, Ottawa, Vancouver and Calgary are the others this year.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 7:27 pm || Up

        I think I’ve already adopted Winnipeg. How could I not?

        • Future Ed Apr 16,2015 8:20 pm || Up

          Although I have many friends from there, you cant root for the flames because:

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 8:43 pm || Up

            Their uniforms are really ugly too. White and orange shirts with black shorts? Yuck.

            • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 17,2015 8:48 pm || Up

              There are quite a few ugly uniforms on display this round. Nashville’s home yellow sweaters are awful, and I contend that the Minnesota Wild’s combo of green and red is the ugliest in all pro sports.

              "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
              • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 8:49 pm || Up

                Man, I like the Minnesota colors. That shade of green is nice.

                I’m looking at the Nashville getups right now. You certainly can’t miss them.

                • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 17,2015 8:51 pm || Up

                  Yuck:

                  "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
                • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 8:52 pm || Up

                  Oh. They looked better last night when the red wasn’t on display quite so much.

                • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 17,2015 8:58 pm || Up

                  Yeah, either color alone isn’t so bad, but together they’re intolerable.

                  This Nashville-Chicago game is exciting.

                  "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
                • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 8:59 pm || Up

                  I think we can at least agree that they aren’t as bad as the orange Giants jerseys.

                • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 9:17 pm || Up

                  Goals!

                • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 9:29 pm || Up

                  Is there no unwritten rule in hockey that you don’t shoot when up three goals and two skaters with 10 seconds left in the game?

                • dmoas Apr 17,2015 9:41 pm || Up

                  Shut up you hoser.

                • Englishmajor Apr 18,2015 3:55 pm || Up

                  The green Wild alts with the diagonal MINNESOTA are nice though.

            • Future Ed Apr 17,2015 8:52 pm || Up

              these guys are from Winnipeg

              I have $5. No I don\'t.
        • colin Apr 17,2015 5:53 am || Up

          ” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen>

          • Englishmajor Apr 17,2015 2:01 pm || Up

            Unlike many Bay Area transplants I was not shocked by the panhandlers the first time I went to Union Square, because I’d already been to Winnipeg.

        • AV Apr 17,2015 9:31 pm || Up

          whoa. i just realized marcel dzama is hipster, and possibly saner/safer, for henry darger.

          *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  28. Glorious Mundy Apr 16,2015 7:12 pm

    Being an NHL ref looks incredibly difficult. I don’t understand how they don’t get laid out 5-10 times a period.

  29. elcroata Apr 16,2015 10:43 pm

    Pennington doing his best to stop the Giants losing streak

    Because survival is insufficient
    • elcroata Apr 16,2015 11:36 pm || Up

      Ay, but even Mighty Penny is but one man.

      Because survival is insufficient
      • ptbnl Apr 16,2015 11:59 pm || Up

        And even after all that, for the Giants this was an improvement.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  30. MikeV Apr 16,2015 10:52 pm

    Ronaldinho is retiring :(

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

    Thanks, and go As.

    • Future Ed Apr 17,2015 5:30 am || Up

      what?

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
    • vignette17 Apr 17,2015 8:45 am || Up

      I always think of this commercial when I see Ronaldinho’s name:

      ” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen>

      • AV Apr 17,2015 9:57 am || Up

        awwww!

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • AV Apr 18,2015 10:22 am || Up
      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  31. ptbnl Apr 17,2015 8:39 am

    So much this:

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • vignette17 Apr 17,2015 8:47 am || Up

      Editing old code (even your own!) can be harder than re-writing sometimes. Because who comments anything? And who optimizes code once it’s working?

      • ptbnl Apr 17,2015 8:52 am || Up

        Yes, no-one, and we do all the time.

        Once you’re playing with hundreds of thousands of cores and a finite allocation of CPU-hours, system- and even concurrency-specific optimization is a constant challenge (though increasingly we’re building in auto-tuning).

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • nevermoor Apr 17,2015 12:48 pm || Up

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • elcroata Apr 17,2015 12:59 pm || Up

        Real programmers never comment their code. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.

        Because survival is insufficient
    • colin Apr 17,2015 9:28 am || Up

      A couple years ago, I TA’d a “data science” class where all of the assignments were written in python, but at the same time it wasn’t really a CS class so we weren’t supposed to heavily penalize students for bad style. Grading those assignments was so FKing painful.

      • AV Apr 17,2015 10:00 am || Up

        not many people got a code to live by anymore.

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
        • ptbnl Apr 17,2015 10:11 am || Up

          I mean, say what you want about the tenets of MATLAB, Dude, at least it’s a code.

          If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
        • Future Ed Apr 17,2015 12:21 pm || Up

          only an asshole gets graded down for style.

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • nevermoor Apr 17,2015 12:49 pm || Up

        Our CS classes didn’t have a style element. Professors just ran programs with various parameters and tested output.

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
  32. Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 11:45 am

    Kareem is the absolute best.

    When we offered the role [of Murdock] to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, I think we offered him $30,000, and then the agent asked for $35,000 because that’s how much this rug cost that Kareem wanted to buy…a couple of weeks later, there’s an article in Time with a picture of Kareem standing in front of the oriental rug that he’d bought for $35,000 after we’d paid him.

  33. Englishmajor Apr 17,2015 4:10 pm

    I managed to persuade even my sports-is-not-real-news colleagues that we should do an interview about the Warriors. I arranged for a very articulate longtime fan who writes good stuff. A couple of hours before the interview, my colleagues started getting cold feet….are we really talking to this guy who’s just a blogger and not even a professional? he isn’t even accredited with the team? Was the ESPN guy not available? etc. I said no no, he’ll be great, don’t worry…. So we call the guy up at the appointed time. His voice sounds a little thin, my engineer asks if he’s on a regular phone. No, he’s on a cordless. Do you have a hardwired phone available? Yes, he says, I think so, just a moment….and we hear him call “Hey, Dad? Can I use your old phone?”
    (But he was great.)

    • Thunderbutt Apr 17,2015 5:06 pm || Up

      Ha ha!

      There is always a score.
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 5:09 pm || Up

      That’s awesome. Which blog, if I may ask?

      • Englishmajor Apr 17,2015 7:46 pm || Up

        The Diss. Here’s the audio.

        • Englishmajor Apr 17,2015 7:49 pm || Up

          (And if you’re thinking “that doesn’t sound like any kind of phone”, we often do this thing now where the guests record themselves on their iPhones and send us the audio to match up with our recording of the host in the studio. But the phone recording has to sound good for backup.)

          • Glorious Mundy Apr 17,2015 7:53 pm || Up

            Whoa, really? That’s awesome. He sounded great.

            • Englishmajor Apr 18,2015 3:59 pm || Up

              Someone at Aspen Public Radio made this instructional video which we send out to guests. It’s great because the guy who plays the guest is perfectly cast as a schlubby academic/policy wonk, and the method assumes that of course, you have access to a big pile of books at your desk.

    • ptbnl Apr 17,2015 5:21 pm || Up

      Not many (parents’) homes have a land-line in the basement.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • AV Apr 17,2015 5:26 pm || Up

      this easter, mrs AV did the hiding of the eggs, but it was raining, so the hunt was in the house. a little girl was looking for the last egg, and she asked for hints, hot or cold. mrs AV said, i’m not going to tell you hot or cold, but i’ll tell you that if it got so hot the house was burning you might find the egg when you call the fire department. she looked in her mom’s purse.

      the egg went unfound, sitting on the cradle of the wall phone till an adult fetched it, because what IS that thing on the wall??

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 17,2015 5:35 pm || Up

      Bwah hah hah hah!

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • elcroata Apr 18,2015 12:24 am || Up

      Your stories are the best

      Because survival is insufficient
  34. Future Ed Apr 17,2015 9:07 pm

    what’s the matter with peavey vogey

    I have $5. No I don\'t.
  35. elcroata Apr 18,2015 2:07 am

    ” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen>

    Because survival is insufficient
    • AV Apr 18,2015 10:42 am || Up

      early 2000s? circa 1997, bitches!

      •

      •

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
      • AV Apr 18,2015 10:43 am || Up

        ooh! notice shadow of film camera selfie!

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 18,2015 10:53 am || Up

          Looks like your getting ready to throw your circle changeup.

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • Future Ed Apr 18,2015 12:00 pm || Up

          i don’t know why people think it started with cellphones. The end of envery roll was usually pictures of my cat or a selfie

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • AV Apr 18,2015 2:23 pm || Up
            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  36. colin Apr 18,2015 6:12 am

    I got a letter yesterday from the Illinois state treasurer saying that they have some “unclaimed property” that might belong to me — specifically a $300 check from the University of Chicago that spelled my last name as “Bischopp” and was addressed to an apartment that I last occupied in 2003. Windfall!

    • colin Apr 18,2015 6:12 am || Up

      Can I have $10?

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 18,2015 7:56 am || Up

      I had this happen years ago, state of CA tracked me down five addresses later about a check I was owed from a Prop 103 car insurance settlement. $150 as I recall. And for about three years after that I kept getting letters from shady for-profit companies promising to connect me with “unclaimed property the government owes you!” for a nominal fee of 50% of the amount I was owed.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • AV Apr 18,2015 10:28 am || Up

      why am i reading this in the voice of chuck d with a sample of hyperbolicsyllabicsesquedalymistic running over it?

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  37. elcroata Apr 18,2015 9:22 am

    I see that the Warriors get the same prime time slots for their playoff games as the A’s do.

    Because survival is insufficient
    • nevermoor Apr 18,2015 3:48 pm || Up

      Not expected to be much of a series.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 18,2015 3:53 pm || Up

      That kind of was the prime Saturday slot. It’s the only one of the day on a broadcast network. Sunday afternoon is probably the prime prime spot, but that was always going to LeBron.

  38. ptbnl Apr 18,2015 10:56 am

    C’mon Reading!

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 18,2015 11:35 am || Up

      Ouch.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
  39. nowBodhi Apr 18,2015 12:32 pm

    It’s the weekend and time for a first: a double dose of anniversary goodness, courtesy of one of the world’s foremost songwriters. These could each pass for legitimate live records and document his tours for I’M YOUR MAN and THE FUTURE… I imagine him being the first guy to play sold-out stadiums at age 100+. So let’s blog down to a place by the river with the venerable Leonard Cohen, in two killer sets from 1988 and 1993… and both taped on April the 18th :P

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
  40. ptbnl Apr 18,2015 12:57 pm

    Extra-innings walk-off for JD in Toronto.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 18,2015 3:59 pm || Up

      3 HRs in two games.

      • MikeV Apr 18,2015 4:11 pm || Up

        THANKS AGAIN, BILLY

        And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

        Thanks, and go As.

  41. Glorious Mundy Apr 20,2015 11:44 am
    • Englishmajor Apr 20,2015 1:21 pm || Up

      Good thing for him the Kings aren’t in the playoffs.

    • dmoas Apr 20,2015 2:52 pm || Up

      Doesn’t really sound like he’s complaining. Mostly he’s just complementing the fans and their enthusiasm.

      • batgirl Apr 20,2015 3:33 pm || Up

        And pretty much ensuring it will be even louder tonight.

    • Future Ed Apr 20,2015 7:03 pm || Up

      wait, there is an NBA tewam called the pelicans?

      I have $5. No I don\'t.
      • Glorious Mundy Apr 20,2015 7:06 pm || Up

        The New Orleans Pellicans. They used to be the New Orleans Hornets. Before that, they were the Charlotte Hornets. Now Charlotte has another team called the Hornets. They used to be the Charlotte Bobcats.

        • Future Ed Apr 20,2015 7:11 pm || Up

          and the supersonics are no more, right?

          I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • Glorious Mundy Apr 20,2015 7:13 pm || Up

            Sadly, right. That still makes me mad.

            • MikeV Apr 20,2015 7:21 pm || Up

              FK Seattle though.

              And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

              Thanks, and go As.

              • Englishmajor Apr 20,2015 8:01 pm || Up

                At the Sunday finale against the Mariners (which I think was also the anniversary of the last SuperSonics game), a guy in front of me was wearing a Sacramento Kings jersey. I applauded the subtlety of his trolling.

  42. Englishmajor Apr 20,2015 4:14 pm

    One of my little great-nieces collects snow globes, but I’ve quickly learned not to buy her expensive glass snow globes because they get broken almost immediately. Just like Ben Zobrist, apparently.

    • andeux Apr 20,2015 4:24 pm || Up

      He’s had only one 15-day DL trip in his last 6 years with Tampa, the A’s get him as a one-year rental, and two weeks in surgery for “existing cartilage issues” is being mentioned as a possibility. Argh.

      TINSTAAFK
      • andeux Apr 20,2015 5:23 pm || Up

        Also leaves us without a backup infielder at all, so not only will Sogard be in the lineup against lefties, but Lawrie can’t take the day off that was planned even before his plunking.

        It would probably be a good idea to get Ladendorf or someone else back on the roster, and cut bait on Cody Ross. I didn’t mind that signing so much, as he used to be a pretty useful platoon player, but so far he really hasn’t offered very much. (Prove me wrong, Cody.)

        TINSTAAFK
        • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 20,2015 6:01 pm || Up

          Yeah, that IF situation is pretty desperate. Who’s our backup 2B tonight…Canha? Gentry?

          "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • Glorious Mundy Apr 20,2015 7:04 pm || Up

          The Joey Wendle era in Oakland is fast approaching.

          • nevermoor Apr 20,2015 10:56 pm || Up

            We have that stud SS prospect, right? Whasisname, Addison Robertson or something?

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
            • elcroata Apr 20,2015 11:44 pm || Up

              A clear corresponding move:

              Because survival is insufficient
    • ptbnl Apr 20,2015 4:44 pm || Up

      They’re also forbidden in carry-on luggage (>3oz liquid) … quite a pile of them at Fairbanks airport security after the conference I went to where they gave them out as party favors.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 20,2015 4:46 pm || Up

      I was on the muni the other day with a whole lot of giants fans who had left their game around the fifth inning clutching their “world series snow globes.” I wanted to “accidentally” smash all of them.

  43. Englishmajor Apr 20,2015 5:46 pm

  44. FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 20,2015 6:57 pm

    Batting around means 10 guys hit. Does anyone besides idiots doubt this?

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    • andeux Apr 20,2015 7:02 pm || Up

      Nine.
      You didn’t used to be wrong about everything. What happened?

      TINSTAAFK
      • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 20,2015 7:36 pm || Up

        I fear for our planet, that a Harvard degree should fall so low. Batting around means that the lineup has come back around to the man who led off, the 10th man. If the 9th guy makes the last out you have not batted around.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • Glorious Mundy Apr 20,2015 7:37 pm || Up

          This is clearly correct.

          • Future Ed Apr 20,2015 7:41 pm || Up

            reply fail to andeux, yeah?

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
        • 5Aces Apr 20,2015 7:41 pm || Up

          I would subscribe to a newsletter containing similar thoughts.

          Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
        • andeux Apr 20,2015 7:46 pm || Up

          I have read your comment several times and it still makes no sense. Once the ninth guy bats, the batting order has come back around to the man who led off, and you have batted around.

          TINSTAAFK
          • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 20,2015 8:01 pm || Up

            Not if the ninth guy makes the last out. You’ve only batted around if the lineup comes back around in the same inning. Hence 10. As a commenter there noted, you haven’t batted around until you’ve messed up my scorebook.

            "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
            • dmoas Apr 20,2015 9:51 pm || Up

              If you spin around in a full circle, does it matter if you stop at place where you started or do you have to go past it?

              • MikeV Apr 20,2015 10:34 pm || Up

                You don’t bat full circle. That’s different

                And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                Thanks, and go As.

              • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 10:41 am || Up

                It’s more like if you’re running a race around a track. 9 guys = stopping right as you’re getting to the finish line. 10 guys = crossing the finish line. If the 9th guy makes the last out, you haven’t “broken the plane” of the finish line

                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 10:47 am || Up

                  But when it comes to the distance of the track, you only include up to the finish line. So in your scenario of the 9th guy making the last out, the circle is completed and will be resumed with the next guy (i.e. crossing that imaginary line you speak of). Whether that next guy ever steps into the box becomes irrelevant just as how far you run across that line makes little difference so long as you *reach* the line. Photo finishes only look at what point the line was reached, not the point where the line was surpassed.

                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 11:07 am || Up

                  The word “around” suggests returning to the starting state. Reaching the end isn’t equivalent to returning to the beginning.

                  Think of it more like a typewriter. 9 PA is like typing until the end of a line. The 10th guy stepping up is resetting the typewriter’s position to the beginning of the next line. There’s no additional typing done between those two states, but only one qualifies for the word “around”

                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 1:17 pm || Up

                  No, simply hitting the return key is going to that next line. You actually have to hit a key to have started a new line. Just the fact you’re sitting on that new line is more than enough for your previous line to have turned over. The stat of being the next player up constitutes a return to the start and doesn’t necessitate actually stepping into the box.

                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 1:27 pm || Up

                  “Next player up” isn’t good enough. It has to be “player actually up.” In your description, your end point is the end of the previous inning, not the start of the current inning. To bat around, you have to get back to the state that represents the start of the inning fully within the encapsulation of one inning. The end of the previous inning or the start of the next inning are irrelevant states

                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 3:02 pm || Up

                  Except the moment the 9th player is out, the 10th player IS *actually* up. Whether he’s allowed to bat because the inning is over or not is irrelevant to the fact that he’s currently “up” for that team. They’ve literally put themselves back into the exact same position as what started the inning, that the current batter if the team were allowed to bat at that moment would be the player who led off the inning.

                • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 3:15 pm || Up

                  Yeah, but up again in the same inning vs. up in a different inning is the key difference.

                  Another way to look at it is that you haven’t batted around until you’ve messed up the scorecard (e.g.)

                  "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:50 am || Up

                  So, when does a clock hand go around, starting at noon? When it comes back to twelve or when it goes to one for the second time?

                  I think that if we go to the analogies and logic, 9 PA clearly wins. “It has always been said that way, and it’s not meant in the exact factual way” is the only point where 10 PA version can win.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 11:03 am || Up

                  If the 10th guy doesn’t come up again, you haven’t returned to the starting point. Your starting point of the loop is when the leadoff man steps into the batter box. If you don’t get back to that leadoff man in the batter box again, you haven’t completed the loop.

                  In your clock analogy, you’re arguing that going from 12 to 11:59 is a full loop. With 9 PA, the starting point and ending point are different states

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:11 am || Up

                  I disagree. A full circle never “returns to the starting point”, because no part of the circle has two points on top of each other. In the clock analogy that would be the infinitesimal point just before reaching the 12 (or the state where we started the loop).

                  It is very easy to discard your theory with batters themselves. If you claim that the full circle is 10 PA, tell me how many times has a team batted around in an inning where they had 900 PA (everybody bunts against Garza, eventually it gets too dark to keep playing).

                  Your theory would say that the team batted around 90 times (10 PA per batting around), yet every player would have batted 100 times.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 11:26 am || Up

                  Yeah, the clock analogy doesn’t really work here. And I shouldn’t have brought PAs into it. It’s not about 10 PAs; it’s about 10 guys. The 10th guy has to get up to bat again, but as soon as he does, what happens from there is the start of a new loop, so to speak.

                  So 9th guy strikes out to end the inning =/= batting around.

                  9th guy walks then gets picked off before a pitch is thrown to the 10th guy == batting around.

                  You have to get back to the top of the lineup within the same inning, regardless of what happens from there

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:31 am || Up

                  For me it is pretty simple. If the next inning starts exactly the way the previous one did it means the previous one went the full circle (regardless of the distinction you make). The 1st guy should be in the box only once in the same inning, just like the any given point of the circle needs to be drawn only once for the circle to be complete.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 1:29 pm || Up

                  For me, it has to all happen within one inning. The next inning and previous inning are completely different self-contained universes as far as this goes. If you don’t get back to the “start of the inning” state within that inning, then you haven’t batted around

                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 1:19 pm || Up

                  There’s a nebulous point where the 10th guy is “up” without having stepped up to the plate. That point is after then 9th batter has finished his AB. Saying you need that 10th guy to step in the box is like saying you need 361 degrees to complete a circle.

                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 1:34 pm || Up

                  The nebulous point is the hinge of the whole debate. My position is that the 10th guy isn’t up until he’s actually up at the plate. When the 9th guy makes the 3rd out, the 10th guy isn’t up, the other team’s leadoff guy is

                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 3:05 pm || Up

                  And I fundamentally disagree with that stance. If you were track the batting order, as many sites do, the 10th guy is the one who, for that team, would be considered “Up” for that team. Just because the other team is now batting is irrelevant. Going back to your “self contained universe” thought, they’ve returned to the original state of the universe by the time that inning had ended, hence the batting order has come around to it’s original state.

                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 3:44 pm || Up

                  The original state of the inning-universe was the leadoff guy batting. When the 9th guy makes the 3rd out, the inning-universe implodes and the leadoff guy is never batting again. You’ve gotten back to the end state of the previous inning, but not the start state of the current inning.

                  Unlike a clock or a race or a circle, the batting order isn’t an unbroken line. There is absolutely a gap between each batter-state, and the end of the 9th guy’s PA and the start of the 10th guy’s are not equivalent. That’s why entire half-innings can happen between them. You’re disregarding the gap between 9th guy and 10th guy, while I’m saying that to bat around, that gap has to be passed through in the same inning

        • nevermoor Apr 20,2015 10:58 pm || Up

          I’m on team FSU here. This is clearly one of the problems arising from a school that lacks Lux.

          "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
          • sslinger Apr 21,2015 12:39 am || Up

            Agreed.

          • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:58 am || Up

            I’ll bite. What is Lux in this context?

            Because survival is insufficient
            • andeux Apr 21,2015 11:15 am || Up

              A reference to the respective mottoes of my and nevermoor’s alma maters, who have a rivalry dating back a few centuries. (Recent by European standards I know, but around here that’s a long time.)

              TINSTAAFK
              • elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:17 am || Up

                Harvard and?

                Because survival is insufficient
                • andeux Apr 21,2015 11:20 am || Up

                  He is a Yalie.

                  TINSTAAFK
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:26 am || Up

                  True story. When I did my SAT (or ACT, I don’t remember what was what) I could write down codes of four universities they would send the results to. I don’t remember exactly, but I think my choices were Cornell (the one I wanted to go to), Princeton, Harvard and MIT. But, being myself, I mistyped one of the codes and it landed in, I think, some public university in Hawaii. I kept getting mail from them and sometimes wonder what life would have been like if I did indeed go there.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • AV Apr 21,2015 12:00 pm || Up

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 12:28 pm || Up

                  Harvard’s motto is “Veritas” while ours is “Lux et Veritas”

                  If you’re at Harvard, that makes us an unoriginal knockoff. If you’re more sensible, it means that Harvard Lacks Lux.

                  "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
                • sslinger Apr 21,2015 3:51 pm || Up

                  You know who else lacks Lux?

                • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 5:46 pm || Up

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 5:46 pm || Up

                  this thread till now?

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • Glorious Mundy Apr 21,2015 11:23 am || Up

                  Harvard and not Harvard is the defining rivalry of our nation.

        • elcroata Apr 20,2015 11:14 pm || Up

          Tough one.

          On one hand I have sailing, where sailing around the world is clearly defined as being on the same longitude twice, which would support FSU interpretation.

          On the other we have the issue of the function repeatability. The way andeux defines batting around, if his team does that every inning, he will have no hard time saying that his team batted around 9 times. Team FSU will have 90 PA, meaning that they actually went through the lineup 10 times, but “batted around” nine.

          I guess it comes down to whom does the space between the 9th and 10th batter belong to.

          Because survival is insufficient
          • andeux Apr 20,2015 11:20 pm || Up

            The FSU interpretation is literally the same as the guy insisting there are 8 days in a week.

            TINSTAAFK
            • MikeV Apr 21,2015 12:06 am || Up

              If you are looking at a calendar:

              Sun Mon Tues Wed Thu Fri Sat
              Sun Mon Tues Wed Thu Fri Sat

              If you start on the first Sunday, “next week” is not Saturday, it’s the 2nd Sunday.

              Batting around is the same concept. The 9th batter is not batting around, the 10th batter who was also the 1st batter is.

              And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

              Thanks, and go As.

              • elcroata Apr 21,2015 12:11 am || Up

                The question is what “around” means, whether it is “complete” or “overlapping”.

                Because survival is insufficient
                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 8:24 am || Up

                  Around means in a circle.

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 8:27 am || Up

                  Which is vague enough that my original point stands

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 9:02 am || Up

                  My personal view is that the 9th batter must complete his AB in such a way that the “10th” man is now “up” for that team whether the inning ends or not. So it’s not enough for the 9th batter to simply step in the box. So a pick off while he’s up isn’t batting around, but him ending the inning by grounding out would be. It’s the completion of the “circle,” not necessarily the the start of a new circle. 10 batters means more than 360 degrees, 9 full batters means 360 degrees.

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 9:24 am || Up

                  I’m inclined to see it the same way

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • MikeV Apr 21,2015 9:29 am || Up

                  I knew I liked you.

                  And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                  Thanks, and go As.

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:40 am || Up

                  I like you, too, but I’m not sure we agree on what seems a better description, do we?

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 21,2015 10:04 am || Up

                  “Batting around” is a term of art, with a specific meaning in the field. Laypeople don’t have meaningful opinions about what it means, any more than I would have a meaningful opinion about the term “capital gains” in a discussion with the IRS.

                  "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 10:27 am || Up

                  Baseball Reference considers it to be 9 plate appearances in an inning.

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:47 am || Up

                  Well, there goes a point for andeux.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • MikeV Apr 21,2015 10:51 am || Up

                  And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                  Thanks, and go As.

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:54 am || Up

                  He’s on Free Kraut?!

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • Glorious Mundy Apr 21,2015 10:56 am || Up

                  If he’s not, he obviously should be.

                • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 11:32 am || Up

                  I totally beat him

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • colin Apr 21,2015 11:38 am || Up

                  So it’s up to ptbnl and me to solve this one observationally then.

                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 11:49 am || Up

                  And then present FSU with a bottle of champagne ;-)

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 10:29 am || Up

                  A fan of accounting could certainly discuss capital gains with the IRS since they have experience with terminology, history, etc. So a fan certainly can speak to what it means to baseball. But if you really feel this way, you can leave the discussion any time you’d like since you don’t feel qualified to have a meaningful opinion.

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:45 am || Up

                  And this is exactly the thing. It is a specific expression, and the logical explanation of the name’s components needs not be what has come to be the accepted meaning. As stated above, logical explanation for me would be that 9 PA are enough, but that doesn’t mean that this is the “correct” definition.

                  However, in absence of a such universally accepted definition (at least known to me), I think that trying some logic is not necessarily a bad thing.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 11:31 am || Up

                  what if the 9th guy gets in the box, and with no pitches thrown a runner gets picked off?

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 11:34 am || Up

                  Not batting around, since the 9th guy will lead off the next inning.

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 1:24 pm || Up

                  9th guy must complete his AB. Even if the 9th guy has a 3 – 2 count and saw 50 pitches, if the runner is picked off, his AB isn’t completed and instead is reset so it’s not batting around. The 9th batter reaching the plate in and of itself doesn’t constitute batting around. It’s the point *between* the 9th and 10th batter that constitutes batting around.

                  Flip the scenario a bit. What happens if the 10th batter gets to the plate, but with no pitches have been thrown before the runner gets picked off. How is that not batting around? You’ve crossed that proverbial finish line.

                • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 1:44 pm || Up

                  I think the latter is batting around. The leadoff hitter comes back up in the same inning.

                  "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
                • dmoas Apr 21,2015 3:07 pm || Up

                  If that’s the case, he doesn’t matter since his plate appearance in all records won’t have existed. For intents and purposes, the runner could be thrown out while the batter is walking up to the plate. And in either case, only 9 hitters have batted.

                • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 3:45 pm || Up

                  We disagree.

                  For me, the triggering event is the leadoff hitter returning to the plate. In other words, batting around is when > 9 batters step in (and batting around twice is when > 18 batters do).

                  The reason, if I’m being honest, is that appearing twice in one inning is cool/unusual for that hitter whereas appearing once is what happens 3-5 times every game.

                  "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 3:52 pm || Up

                  You’re right that what we’re marking by naming here is something cool/unusual. What is in dispute is whether that thing is
                  (a) all 9 batters having a PA in the same inning, or
                  (b) at least one batter having 2 PAs in an inning.

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • AV Apr 22,2015 12:02 am || Up

                  a) batting once through the order.

                  b) batting around.

                  these are the names given to those different events. one’s midnight. the other is happy new year.

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 3:46 pm || Up

                  Yeah, we’re all agreed there. The 10th guy doesn’t have to register a PA, but he does have to get to the plate

                • batgirl Apr 21,2015 3:57 pm || Up

                  I think I’ll state the obvious here: what time does the game start today?

                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 4:06 pm || Up

                  7:05

                  Did your front row seat tickets arrive yet?

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • batgirl Apr 21,2015 4:09 pm || Up

                  Not yet–probably in my mailbox as we speak!

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 9:56 pm || Up

                  Not all.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • AV Apr 21,2015 12:02 pm || Up

                  unrelated but i’ve been meaning to ask. in germany and other countries in your area, what day does the wall-hanging, typical calendar begin with? monday, or sunday?

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 12:09 pm || Up

                  Monday all around

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • AV Apr 21,2015 12:33 pm || Up

                  all around? wait. is that 7 mondays in a row? or 8???

                  seriously though, US calendars… where does the sunday start come from?

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • 5Aces Apr 21,2015 12:34 pm || Up

                  No facts to back this up, but I’ll say church.

                  Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
                • AV Apr 21,2015 12:44 pm || Up

                  sure. it’s probably religion-related, maybe tenuously or coindicentally, but how exactly?

                  there’s, yada yada yads, rest (and keep holy/go to church) on the 7th day… which makes monday 1st right? unless you have sabbath on saturday, which makes sunday first. but how does the hebrew week get adopted into US culture? were the first printers in the US jewish and they made calendars that made sense for themselves, which got used widely, and the tradition stuck? was there some reform-type movement among christians/puritans to reset the week to a more scripturetimes-like format and that stuck? were there 140 bits at the end of the week that rolled over into monday??

                  *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
                • 5Aces Apr 21,2015 2:09 pm || Up

                  I’m seeing it as some Calvinist asshole made the calendars and he decided nothing was more important than church so it should be the first thought on your mind; hence first day I’m going to show you.

                  Oddly related; Companies that start their week on a wierd day. Evil Empire bank was that way-well they still are I just dont have to deal with it. They start the week on Saturday for payroll purposes and it never ceases to screw something up for scheduling or coordinating with vendors, etc.

                  Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 9:57 pm || Up

                  And their year in November.

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • Englishmajor Apr 21,2015 2:13 pm || Up

                  I remember being very confused about this as a kid, because TV Guide started with Saturday so I figured that was the real first day of the week.

                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 12:42 pm || Up

                  Well, go no further than your own language. Sabado does seem to come from Sabbath.

                  Because survival is insufficient
            • Glorious Mundy Apr 21,2015 10:33 am || Up

              If people haven’t read that bodybuilding forum thread, I encourage you to do so. I have rarely laughed so hard at the Internet.

              • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 10:54 am || Up

                If someone who calls himself milfhunter is calling you a “fuking moron,” you should reconsider some things in life

              • doctorK Apr 21,2015 11:04 am || Up

                Love this.

            • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:39 am || Up

              Actually, doesn’t that guy insist that there are 15 days in two weeks? So, 7.5 days a week?

              Because survival is insufficient
          • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 12:30 pm || Up

            I don’t think it’s 10 PAs/batting around. I think batting around twice in an inning happens when the leadoff hitter steps in a third time.

            "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
        • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 10:37 am || Up

          FSU is correct. If the 9th guy makes the 3rd out, then you’ve run through the lineup, but not batted around. The leadoff man of the inning has to come up to bat again

          • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:46 am || Up

            With “FSU is correct”, you mean that you share his interpretation?

            Because survival is insufficient
            • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 11:10 am || Up

              This is the Internet. I don’t think we’re allowed to have interpretations. Only blindingly obvious correctness and misguided horrible wrongness permitted

          • MikeV Apr 21,2015 10:52 am || Up

            The leadoff man of the inning has to come up to bat again

            this.

            And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

            Thanks, and go As.

            • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:53 am || Up

              Well, I’m not sure you like me anymore ;-)

              Because survival is insufficient
              • MikeV Apr 21,2015 11:14 am || Up

                :shakes fist:

                And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                Thanks, and go As.

          • dmoas Apr 21,2015 10:56 am || Up

            So when they throw the ball around the horn and they fail to throw it back to the catcher, they’re not actually throwing the ball around the horn?

            • MikeV Apr 21,2015 11:15 am || Up

              There’s not even a horn.

              And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

              Thanks, and go As.

            • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 12:37 pm || Up

              Doesn’t matter since those assholes decided to cut out the first baseman years ago.

              "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    • AV Apr 20,2015 8:17 pm || Up

      my only quibble here is with the word hit. some could walk. a couple could be out. and the new guy with a name like the old guy’s would be IHBP.

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 21,2015 1:43 pm || Up

      This linguistic debate is fun and interesting, but my position is that “batting around” has to mean that the guy who led off the inning comes to bat again in the same inning (or, I suppose, a pinch hitter for him comes to bat in the same inning) because otherwise who cares.

      • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 21,2015 2:09 pm || Up

        That is in fact what “batting around” has traditionally meant. If you surveyed broadcasters with 20 years or more in the biz I am certain that 100% would subscribe to this definition. To the extent that younger literalists want to deconstruct the language and bring in a new definition per changing common use, that, um, begs the question.

        "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
        • andeux Apr 21,2015 2:13 pm || Up

          This is simply factually wrong. In fact directly contradicted by your original link.

          TINSTAAFK
        • Soaker Apr 21,2015 3:09 pm || Up

          The reality is, 20 years as an MLB broadcaster does not necessarily establish authority (7 years with the Astros, 6 with the Rangers and this is his 10th with the A’s).

          What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
          • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 5:48 pm || Up

            10th?

            oh god

            I have $5. No I don\'t.
          • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 21,2015 5:55 pm || Up

            No, but that kind of tenure does confer some knowledge of the games norms, and the requirement to describe them. I stand by the assertion that a poll of broadcasters would overwhelmingly say 10 guys bat.

            "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
            • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 6:00 pm || Up

              my impression comes from listening to vin scully in my youth, when the 9th batter came up he would say “and the “X” have batted around.

              I may be mistaken, but that is my impression

              I have $5. No I don\'t.
              • Glorious Mundy Apr 21,2015 6:04 pm || Up

                Nope

                But Vin Scully, the legendary broadcaster who has been calling Dodgers games since 1950, disagrees. A team spokesman said that Scully belongs to Team 10, because “the term ‘around’ implies that you’re back to the top.”

                • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 6:51 pm || Up

                  then I made a wonderful hedge

                  I have $5. No I don\'t.
        • dmoas Apr 21,2015 3:13 pm || Up

          Yeah, that’s complete and utter BS. The very fact that there’s no defining term specifying this and no consensus within the industry fundamentally contradicts this stance. You bat around based on the definition of what “around” means. There’s nothing fundamental about baseball that gives this some special/new meaning. We’re not talking about foul pole really being a fair pole. We’re talking about how the English language works and how it applies to a baseball event. Even if the original person to use it referred to as 10 hitters, they’d still have been inherently using the term “around” wrong. It’s like people who are using the word “literal” as “figurative.” You can use it wrongly all you want, it doesn’t make it’s use correct.

    • andeux Apr 21,2015 4:35 pm || Up

      A picture being worth 1000 words (or in this case, my horrible picture done in powerpoint being worth maybe a couple hundred words), here is the clock analogy for an inning in which all 9 players bat.
      My view of the world is the top two pictures.
      The tenthers seem to believe the bottom two, nonsensical though it may be.

      TINSTAAFK
      • MikeV Apr 21,2015 9:41 pm || Up

        I mean, your view of the world isn’t completing the circle. The #1 batter should be at the 12:00 position, since he is starting the inning just as 12:00 starts the day.

        The lower image is also incorrect, because your numbers aren’t in the right spots.

        An inning cannot begin until the first batter has seen a pitch. That’s why the announce the official start time after first pitch. In the first picture, the arrow is pointing to between at bats.

        And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

        Thanks, and go As.

        • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:03 pm || Up

          Even if so, you do not need to draw a dot tow times on any given position to complete a circle.

          Because survival is insufficient
          • MikeV Apr 21,2015 10:15 pm || Up

            Correct, but you need to actually start a new one and not just complete the first.

            And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

            Thanks, and go As.

            • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:22 pm || Up

              And this is where we will just have to agree we have differing opinions. As I said before, I see what completing a circle is with high certainty. If the opposing view does not actually dispute when a circle is complete, but posits that “around” implies a start of the new circle, then I can definitely be agnostic about whether “tradition” and “baseball specific circumstances” supersede geometry.

              Because survival is insufficient
              • MikeV Apr 21,2015 10:35 pm || Up

                makes sense.

                Those guys are still wrong though. :D

                And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                Thanks, and go As.

      • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:02 pm || Up

        This.

        Because survival is insufficient
      • AV Apr 22,2015 12:03 am || Up

        thing is, just because you didn’t write the number in, doesn’t mean you’re not pointing to the 10th position.

        alternate title, in your world nobody says happy new year.

        *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  45. andeux Apr 20,2015 7:33 pm
    TINSTAAFK
  46. 5Aces Apr 20,2015 9:14 pm

    So the lilest Ace has to do a solar system project for school. I really want to black out a shoe box and put a little dot in it. “This is our solar system just before the big bang”.

    Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
    • ptbnl Apr 20,2015 9:24 pm || Up

      Gah … ack … but … gahhhhh.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
      • 5Aces Apr 20,2015 9:30 pm || Up

        Please excuse the crudity of this model. I didn’t have time to build it to scale.

        Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
        • ptbnl Apr 20,2015 9:32 pm || Up

          It’s the “before the Big Bang” bit that’s giving me conniptions.

          If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
          • 5Aces Apr 20,2015 9:38 pm || Up

            When would everything be in a single point? I’m sure I’m saying it as horribly as possible. (feel free to edit to make me sound smrter as well if that is easier on your mind than re-explaining to me).

            Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
            • ptbnl Apr 20,2015 9:46 pm || Up

              If the Universe is infinite, never. If the Universe is finite then (maybe) at time zero.

              To me it makes most sense to think of time as logarithmic, in which case the Big Bang happens at time minus infinity. We can theorize (and even observe, albeit indirectly) further and further back in time but we’ll never make it all the way to the Big Bang.

              If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
              • MikeV Apr 20,2015 10:35 pm || Up

                time minus infinity.

                Nope, that one broke my brain.

                And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                Thanks, and go As.

                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 12:12 am || Up

                  Logarithms are just the powers of 10, so

                  log(1000) = 3
                  log(100) = 2
                  log(10) = 1
                  log(1) = 0
                  log(0.1) = -1
                  log(0.01) = -2
                  log(0.001) = -3

                  etc.

                  Smaller and smaller fractions have more and more negative logarithms, culminating in log(0) = -∞

                  So if the Big Bang is at (conventional) time zero then in log-time it’s at minus infinity, which I think more accurately reflects its distance from us.

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • colin Apr 21,2015 5:16 am || Up

                  Especially makes sense if you are dumb enough to consider an early period of exponential growth in the size of the universe.

                • MikeV Apr 21,2015 9:01 am || Up

                  :blinks:

                  And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                  Thanks, and go As.

                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 10:45 am || Up

                  So out of genuine interest, it is the math or the cosmology that’s the stumbling block?

                  It’s a concept I often use in pop-cosmology because to me it makes things clearer than thinking about time having a beginning or what “before the Big Bang” means, so it would be good to know if it is actually adding to the confusion, and if so how.

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 10:51 am || Up

                  What pop-cosmology bands would you recommend?

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 11:09 am || Up

                  Alpher and the B-Modes “Insane in the M-brane”

                  If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
                • elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:14 am || Up

                  asvd

                  Because survival is insufficient
                • MikeV Apr 21,2015 10:52 am || Up

                  Math. I hate math.

                  And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

                  Thanks, and go As.

              • Future Ed Apr 21,2015 7:05 am || Up

                when does the universe bat around?

                I have $5. No I don\'t.
              • 5Aces Apr 21,2015 8:49 am || Up

                Once I had logged off and was trying to go to sleep I got my head to this point (without the actual intelligent description of course). But by then I figured I had done enough damage to the scientific community for one night.

                Originally I was going to say just after the Big Bang, but I figured that had it’s own set of problems.

                Of course this is a lot of joking for a bad joke to make to a perfectly nice 3rd grade teacher.

                Somewhat related note: if I was a craft store, I would contact every school district in my area andfind out when they are doing projects like this so we dont run out of “model the solar system” kits. While I actually prefer that we are going to have to make it all ourselves, as a business I would want everyone coming to me last minute for a big mark up.

                Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
          • AV Apr 21,2015 12:08 pm || Up

            oh. i woulda thought it was about confusing the universe with the solar system.

            *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
            • 5Aces Apr 21,2015 12:24 pm || Up

              No see that one is straight forward. Our solar system is in there. Just with a bunch of extra stuff too. I may ask Mrs. Davis to give him extra credit for that.

              Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
              • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 12:39 pm || Up

                The seed of our solar system, as a quantum fluctuation, sure.

                If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • nevermoor Apr 20,2015 10:59 pm || Up

      Just draw a picture of Pluto.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • Thunderbutt Apr 20,2015 11:13 pm || Up

        There is always a score.
  47. elcroata Apr 21,2015 7:38 am
    Because survival is insufficient
  48. elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:19 am

    Because survival is insufficient
    • Glorious Mundy Apr 21,2015 11:22 am || Up

      Speaking of Hal McRae, Grant’s SBNation piece on the weekend fracas had an excellent reminder about his “sliding” technique.

    • ptbnl Apr 21,2015 11:25 am || Up

      Rate is a terrible metric here … any time a coach said “Fuck” would tie the record.

      If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
      • elcroata Apr 21,2015 11:31 am || Up

        Five to qualify?

        Because survival is insufficient
      • 5Aces Apr 21,2015 12:32 pm || Up

        Well I really feel there needs to be some other quality that will unfortunately be subjective. I can say fuckity fucking fucked up fuck heads and destroy them all. But it isnt very interesting.

        I often overlook Elia since I don’t personally remember it. But I think it is still the winner when I try to be objective.Telling your own fans to get a fucking job is something else. And to not have Lasorda’s Bevacqua tirade listed is a crime.

        Camelot sure fell apart, didn't it? -Steve McCatty
        • andeux Apr 21,2015 1:16 pm || Up

          Elia, Lasorda/Bevacqua, and Lasorda/Kingman will always be the classics to me. And, yeah, probably Elia as the champion of those, for its pure unhingedness.

          Weaver’s “Managers Corner” bit is the one that really cracks me up, but it’s not quite in the same category, since it was done tongue-in-cheek.

          TINSTAAFK
  49. batgirl Apr 21,2015 11:55 am

    I will definitely list this in the positive column for Libby Schaaf.

  50. elcroata Apr 21,2015 12:10 pm

    Only five games for Herrera

    Because survival is insufficient
    • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 1:17 pm || Up

      Seems about right to me, honestly. He’s an RP, so it actually matters and he didn’t actually hit anyone.

      If he hits someone next series, that’s when you drop 25 on him.

      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 21,2015 1:30 pm || Up

        I would have thought the head thing would have upped it to 10 games, but if TPTB are discounting that for whatever reason, then 5 makes sense

    • dmoas Apr 21,2015 1:26 pm || Up

      And it’ll get cut down to 3 or 4 via appeal.

  51. ptbnl Apr 21,2015 1:17 pm

    WTF Champions League Porto shipping 5 goals in the first half defending a 3-1 lead from the first leg.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
    • AV Apr 21,2015 1:19 pm || Up

      sad, but true.

      *i’m* AV. alex vause. put this loon in psych before she hurts someone.
  52. Soaker Apr 21,2015 5:07 pm

    2015 NFL schedule has the Raiders on the road on October 4, when the Coliseum is available because the A’s are in Seattle, then at home on October 11, creating a potential conflict with the AL Division Series. There’s also a potential conflict with the World Series on November 1.

    Also for Raiders season ticket holders: Don’t plan on doing any last-minute shopping on Christmas Eve.

    What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • Englishmajor Apr 21,2015 5:28 pm || Up

      If that ends up being the last game ever in Oakland, expect a lot of Mark Davis-Grinch mashups.

    • FreeSeatUpgrade Apr 21,2015 5:52 pm || Up

      Heh heh, they also play at home on my anniversary and my daughter’s birthday. This is gonna be tricky.

      "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
      • Soaker Apr 22,2015 9:59 am || Up

        The Raiders and Broncos have reportedly been told that they could flip-flop home games if the A’s are in the playoffs, as opposed to having the Raiders play a late-night game as they did a couple years ago. If that happened, the Raiders would have four straight home games in December…great if they had a shot at the playoffs, not so much if they were 2-9 going into that stretch.

        What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
    • nevermoor Apr 21,2015 6:25 pm || Up
      "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
      • MikeV Apr 21,2015 9:44 pm || Up

        FIVE 10am east coast games?

        Fuck the NFL.

        And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

        Thanks, and go As.

      • Dial C for Concupiscence Apr 22,2015 10:30 am || Up

        A no-hold-barred plummeting tailspin will do that for you

  53. MikeV Apr 22,2015 4:37 pm

    Uh, ouch.

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

    Thanks, and go As.

  54. MikeV Apr 22,2015 4:40 pm

    Still going.

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser.

    Thanks, and go As.

    • andeux Apr 22,2015 4:44 pm || Up

      Chris Young + Gregorio Petit = Murderer’s Row

      TINSTAAFK
      • ptbnl Apr 22,2015 6:10 pm || Up

        Once Alex Rodriguez got a hit, that was the cue to pull Price.

        If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
  55. lenscrafters May 8,2015 2:40 pm

    As if we weren’t already like the 2009 A’s…

    • Soaker May 8,2015 2:51 pm || Up

      Your challenge is to name the A’s pitcher without looking too closely at the name on his back.

      What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • andeux May 8,2015 2:59 pm || Up

        My guess was that guy we got for Swisher but I couldn’t remember his name (FDLS) and it is wrong anyway.

        TINSTAAFK
      • colin May 8,2015 3:38 pm || Up

        It’s TARE, right?

      • lenscrafters May 8,2015 5:36 pm || Up

        Angel Castro’s goal is to not be the obscure answer of a similar question 6 years from now.

        • Soaker May 8,2015 5:57 pm || Up

          I’m afraid Chad Smith has missed his best chance to be the obscure answer of a similar question.

          What I discovered Blew. My. Mind. -- Pat Boone
      • James V. May 9,2015 12:29 am || Up
    • Dial C for Concupiscence May 8,2015 2:55 pm || Up

      *glances nervously in Vin Mazzaro’s direction*

    • vignette17 May 8,2015 3:22 pm || Up

      Was it Ron Flores?

      I cheated. What the heck is a Cedrick Bowers?

      • Glorious Mundy May 8,2015 3:42 pm || Up

        It’s the name of the guy who I thought killed Matt Carson, but apparently not.

      • colin May 8,2015 6:01 pm || Up

        Yeah, I looked it up too. I feel like I’m a fairly obsessive A’s fan, but there are so damn many players who I just never paid attention to.

    • Glorious Mundy May 8,2015 5:49 pm || Up

      Looking at Matt Carson’s Fangraphs page, and he put up one of the all time insane SSS seasons for the 2013 Clevelands: .636/.692/.909 with three steals in 13 PA. Hasn’t been in the big leagues since.

      • nevermoor May 8,2015 7:47 pm || Up

        If he’d just played a bit better…

        "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"

Leave a Reply