Non-Lonely Hearts Lounge

Hi darlings! We’re getting closer to  the time when we get to celebrate the best six months of the year. I cannot forget how amazing last year was and how much I adored you all, and how much it meant to celebrate our team together.  I can not wait!

Let’s talk about all the fun things we want to do this year.

200 comments to Non-Lonely Hearts Lounge

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    Afternoon naps are amazing.

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    We all need to have them.

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    How are you?

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    Alive.

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    Tell me more, Tell me more,

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    Did you get very far?

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    Was it love at first sight?

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    Like did he have a car?

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    Uh Huh, Uh Huh! Uh HUH! Yeah, yeah!

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    I would like to drink a beer or two at an A’s game this year.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    That is so going to happen!

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    WOO!
    I keep looking dreamily at my little stack of tickets.

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    I would like to join you in this activity

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    What size beer?

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    Me too. Alas.

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    I want to grill with Mikey.

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    Who?

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    Tits McV.

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    Bwhahahaha

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    Heh, its gonna stick huh.

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    I hope so. I’ll do my part.

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    Mikey V.

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    I want to not get high with Josh.

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    Too bad, then…he gives everyone within six car lengths a contact high.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    I want to be within six car lengths of him then.

    TINSTAAFK
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    I partook of what he had to offer, and oh my gosh! I barely could function! It was hilarious!

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    That was the “most unlikely Division Championship in history” stash, it only comes once in a lifetime :D

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    I’m so glad I got home safely.

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    LOL! I was out of my mind!

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    the look on your face when it hit was hilarious, priceless!

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    I know. I can’t even say. Only TFR would hang with me.

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    (Hint: just being in the same facility as that stuff caused Josh Hamilton to drop the ball.)

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    No shit!

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    I don’t even want to share that experience.

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    That’s funny, I thought I just give everyone within 6 cars lengths a terrible headache.

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    I want to move back to the Bay Area.

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    We want you too as well darling!

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    I want to be able to buy 2014 season tickets.

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    I want to eat some of Chickie’s cookies.

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    They’re FKing amazing, I can assure you.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    So I keep hearing.

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    I want to introduce you to my mother’s pulao.

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    I want to meet more of you in person!

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    I want to use up all 10 condoms I bought.

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    Balloon animals?

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    No one wants a balloon earth worm.

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    Seems more likely than the intended purpose.

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    Somehow it always seems right to buy condoms by the gross.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
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    It’s nice that you want to protect your hand when you masturbate.

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    I said 10 pack, not lifetime supply.

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    When can that happen?

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    I don’t know, I have to meet a willing girl first…

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    This is the NON-lonely hearts lounge.

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    Which means, there are willing girls. :)

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    Or it means I have to leave. There are 2 kinds of girls in the world: the ones that will sleep with me, and the ones that actually exist.

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    Or the ones that will introduce you to the Oakland A’s in Oakland gently.

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    Now don’t you go getting my hopes up.

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    Getting your hopes up is what I want.

    I’m walking on sunshine, whoa!

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    Don’t go breaking my heart…

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    Don’t go breaking my, don’t go go breaking my…

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    You’re no one’s backup singer, Lynn. ♥

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    And you’re no one’s back up, at all.

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    That love the A’s baseball.

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    So they’re perfect!

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    Of course!

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    Whoa, whoa. That’s crazy talk.

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    Perhaps your standards are too high, excluding birthers and gals with unpleasant accents.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    The accents we can work around, depending on the personality. Oh, and fans of certain teams are excluded.

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    You are waaaaay too picky.

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    And people who make me look at nasty shit on google are right out.

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    Thank God.

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    That’s one list I don’t want on.

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    You say that now. Once you go brown, you stick around.

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    No one says that.

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    They don’t have to.

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    I always thought it was implied.

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    Precisely!

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    You are cute, honey.

    I’ve always thought so.

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    :) See, Jennifer? Nananananana!

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    And Ray He’s my go to UPS guy, and amazing!

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    Is he brown?

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    He is, and gorgeous!

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    I thought it was “What can Brown do for you?”

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    What CAN’T brown do for you?

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    Where do I begin?

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    apparently get payments processed.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    THAT’S RAYCESS!

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    Not in this context. Apparently FetLife is gonna have to purge all scat-related content or their payment processor’s going to drop them.

    Mind you, I think scat play is as gross as most people do, but free speech should trump that, and individual states’ Attorneys General shouldn’t be able to fuck with national and international payment processors over local indecency laws.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    I want this franchise to continue rising from the dead and I wanna share it all with you at innumerable parking lot conferences and games featuring unprecedented food so delicious it makes my taste buds Bernie Lean right in my mouth.

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    I want to get ejected from a game because I heckled A(sshole)J(ackoff) Pierzynski to tears.

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    We adore you!

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    Okay, night my loves.

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    So last night a girl literally jumped on me wrapping her legs around my hips and making out with my face. She did this in front of 19 yo, who I use to date when, you guessed it, she was 19. This was a combination of tragic and awesome, percentages of each shall be determined later.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    You’re in the wrong business.. take if from me, this “social justice” stuff is a waste of time. You need to become a porn star and XXX movie mogul.

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    Naw. I have no desire to be in porn. I would however like one of these people to want to legitimately date me however.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    I hope you please pick the wrapping, making out girl. You deserve each other. Where as the 19 year old doesn’t deserve you.

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    19 yo isn’t someone I would want to date long term. She is so completely different from me as a human being that I would want to have a intense tryst with her while I learn about myself and nothing more or less. She is a idea more than a person, as almost a personification of the ethereal that I just do not understand as someone grounded in logic willpower throwing myself against the breakers of societies ills.

    After writing that I can help but feel pompous. But it is what it is.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    I’d do the same and hope that once the insanity wore off we’d both have grown to the point that the long term thing felt right and it would be less creepy as a result.

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    Haha! Yes. The creepy part.

    Deep breathe.

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    I really don’t think that a four and a half year age difference is THAT creepy.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Well I’m nearly 34 so that’s where the creepy factors plays in.

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    oh yeah… but its not for me thats all.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    She and I would never work. Its beyond the age thing.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Ah. Well that’s a whole other thing in itself.

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    Did i mention that shes a drunk?

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Yeah, I don’t think I’d even want to do a tryst with that regardless of age.

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    I mean its not bad bad. But she gets sloppy sometimes.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Yeah, I’m just not into even the sloppy drunk thing. I don’t have a problem with people doing it, don’t have a problem with friends doing it, don’t have a problem with them doing it in front of me. But it’s a big turn off for me.

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    its a weird dynamic for sure, and getting called at 3 am on a sunday isn’t the best. But there is something captivating about her.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    It occurs to me that I know no one who has nor ever would call me at 3am for anything. Then again, I wouldn’t pick up if they did so there’s that too.

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    Sometimes a cute girl is drunk and lost in the city, despite the fact that you know exactly where she is and its just a good idea to put some pants on and go pick her up and drive her home, despite her insisting that you are going the opposite direction of her house the entire way.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Children, siblings and parents.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
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    What about DFA’s?

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Yes, I’d put my pants on and see you safe home.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
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    Have none. Have one who lives in CO and has a wife to call. Have only one who I talk to and has better means of reaching me.

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    Thanks PTBNL

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    I’d ignore your call and not bother to listen to the message until I deleted several months later.

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    eh if you called me i would think it was a hoax because we all know dmoas doesn’t leave the house.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Trufax. And dmoas doesn’t call people.

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    you wouldn’t pick up a phone ringing on 3 AM?

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    My phone is set to vibrate so the likelihood of me even hearing it is slim. But no. Probably not.

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    The 19 yo, now that is a “conquest”.

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    Well she is 22 now. I met her when she was 18. My friend gave her the nick name shortly later when she turned 19.

    She is quite pretty.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Hey what’s everyone doing? Everyone except DFA, who is surely on a dance floor somewhere making several young women have multiple orgasms just by looking at them.

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    We’re having an old-fashioned Valentine’s exchange next week at nursey school. I pained a shoebox black and cut out the Batman logo on the front. Put yellow plastic wrap behind the lid and installed a light in the back so it lights up like the Bat Signal. It fucking rocks.

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    That sounds fantastic, can you post a pic?

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    I took it apart to add another coat of paint, but here’s a crappy photo of it before.

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    That’s all kinds of awesomeness.

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    I thought about using a red light bulb to make it more Valentine’s-ish. I also wanted to make the logo have a heart in it, but it’s not sturdy enough for me to cut anymore.

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    Wow, you kinda are Batman!

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    HT to Mom, who let me take apart one of her lamps.

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    Pretty awesome!

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    cooked dinner for Kitty, now we’re watching Jack White on Austin City Limits on the DVR.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    Damn, I bet that’s a good show. I really didn’t like Jack or any of his bands until I saw The Dead Weather play at Bonnaroo. It was… special.

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    a little sexist how he’s got his backup bands divided by gender, but everyone’s outfits are cute on both sides and both bands are shit hot.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    The show at Bonnaroo was like watching soft-core porn on stage. Prolly why I liked it so much. But festivals are my thing. I think laying in a field of grass with your friends, listening to music and watching the crowd is one of the most enjoyable things I’ve ever done.

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    Another exciting Friday night here. I ate leftover Indian food, watched a couple episodes of ST:TNG on Netflix, and edited some photos. What about you?

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    I am watching the Lou Reed “Berlin” concert and doing laundry because I gots to. I am also thinking of dinner soon.

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    Right on.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    Kids are in bed and the nurse is at work. The house is mine. Time to get down to some serious laundry folding. Also later probably some porn.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    Perhaps you could combine the two? A little “Fabric Softener Babes VII” or “Misty Goes Downy” perhaps?

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    For the love of God, please tell me you have your phone tonight.

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    played soccer. hamstring hurts. guy tried to take out my knee. won 1st game lost 2nd game.

    I have whiskey. I need a massage. and a BJ.

    pliny the younger tomorrow.

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser
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    I in fact did not go out dancing. I had a have pan will travel dinner date. I taught the girl how to butcher a chicken, then made dinner, then we watched some youtube videos before fooling around. I wonder how many dates in the history of the universe have had those events occur.

    So, as shes taking her pants off she stops, looks at me seriously and says “Friend, I just want to let you know we’re not going to have sex.” I laughed for about four minutes.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    That is hilarious… it’s like pulling a 9-iron out of the caddy’s bag and saying “There is no way we are playing golf today.”

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    home from dinner and laying low. saving up energy for the ritual tomorrow. i am so glad it is almost baseball season.

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    2 DAYS!!!

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    i’m not sure i can wait that long. ;)

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    I need a guacamole recipe. Anyone care to share?

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    i make that a lot, but it’s not a set recipe. i can tell you what i do, but i don’t have measurements; someone here may be more helpful but i’m willing to share.

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    It’s for a party. I’d like to try making it, just to say I have. But it’s just as easy to leave it out.

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    it is really easy, and doesn’t take much time if you want to give it a try. i usually do 2-3 avocados mashed. then a half or a whole jalapeno (depending on the heat level–some of them just taste like bell peppers, and that sucks) diced up super small, a clove or two of garlic, pressed with the juice, then some finely diced red onion and cilantro. fresh-squeezed lime juice (maybe about a half a lime or a whole one) and ground sea salt until it tastes right, mix it well, then refrigerate with the pit in and saran pressed on the top for an hour or two.

    take out the pit, stir again, add more salt and lime until it tastes the way i want it to.

    i wish i could be more specific. you really can’t fuck up gauc, though, and sometimes it is good with just avo, lime juice, and salt.

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    Thanks. I don’t really like the taste of guac, but others do. So I guess I’m going to try it.

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    anytime. let me know if you do. i’m sure others here have better, more exact recipes.
    and happy belated birthday! i think i missed it. i’ve been of in la la land.

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    Yup, pretty much exactly what Jesa said, which is a great recipe btw, only diff in mine is I add 1 diced roma tomato and a bit of ground black pepper.

    ***Really important – make sure the avocados have a little give to them, the oils/ flavors aren’t as present if they’re too hard.***

    If you dont want the heat of the jalapeno remove the seeds, the more seeds and veins the more heat. I actually like to lightly roast the peppers a bit over an open flame for a minute, I use a fork to hold em’, before I cut em up.

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    roasting the jalapenos beforehand is a brilliant idea.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    You don’t need to leave the pit in if you use lime juice. The citric acid is what stops the chemical reaction that causes the avocado to brown.

    "Once you go Kay there is no other way."- Bed
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    If you want to do it the easy way just mash up a few avocados and a can of rotel, plus maybe some garlic powder

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser
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    what is rotel?

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    Lighter fluid and capers.

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    The official state vegetable of Texas.

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    some weird canned tomoato/peppers mixture.

    And I have to say: mikev is one of my favorite people on here -slusser
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    Wow, going to be a hot chocolate kind of afternoon I’m guessing.

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    I did a lot of shovelling, then ate lunch and had hot chocolate with marshmallow!

    My fiancee and I are out at her parents house for the weekend. Going home tomorrow and I hope that someone else cleared out the driveway so I don’t have to start shovelling again.

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    I the snow is ‘wet’ it’s pretty backbreaking, I lucked out growing up in the city, only had to worry about the sidewalk and a channel in and out of the house…

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    If*

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    It was like 20°F last night, so the snow was nice and dry.

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    If I were a teenage kid and my family had a snowblower I would be out making a pile of money.

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    Nice to be out of the bad South Pole weather, huh?

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    It is a lot warmer here, but 22 inches is like a decade worth of snowfall at the pole.

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    wanted to check in when the season started. and the AFA starts / the WCQ hex started this week! so…

    southampton really put the screws on city today. or rather, hart did.

    usmnt, well… can’t play like that again.

    mexico, i like the team, but i’m kinda glad for the jamaican tie when i think of the way azteca fans behave.

    my boys… they keep playing like that! (that’s both in sustained offensive deftness and suddenly ooof-y defense.)

    brazil is not nearly in WC shape. watch me weep.

    bufon was spectacular midweek, not so much today.

    zombie riquelme returns to boca! (and so did zombie bianchi, if you missed it.)

    cristiano continues to prove he’s not emotionally a bitchy 5th grade girl… by getting in a fight with casillas’ girlfriend over what she said he said in the locker room about what someone else said about who he likes and who he doesn’t.

    now playing, lazio v napoli, to determine who’s got the prettier light blue. (lazio seems to have the edge 11 minutes in.)

    but now that it’s noon, godoy cruz v all boys kicks off the torneo.

    -

    and to stick with the theme of the lounge:

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    (it didn’t let me link the link i linked. new FK thing?)

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    Lots of things are broken, pending a fix or change of host. In the meanwhile you have to put any html stuff in by hand.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
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    thanks for the fix/edit.

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    Also, Hi!

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    howdy!

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    Hart’s such a Jekyll and Hyde … the penalty double-stop against Brazil was amazing, but today was farcical.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
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    right?

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    the story so far:

    with shooting like that, you *want* to like cristiano. ha! and he scores again as i type.

    my home town team, newly coached by palermo, is tied.

    10 minutes till boca comes out at the bombonera.

    napoli stol the argument from lazio 2 minutes from the end and the light blue is still up in the air.

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    oh crap. a bucket of ice water. (or beer, i should say when playing quilmes.) boca’s already down 2 at 8 minutes 30.

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    well that was fun. boca tied it 2-2. stopped a penalty. got a guy sent off. and won it on a geometric 2-touch corner volley.

    the nightcap is a holy matchup. san martín de san juan v san lorenzo.

    didn’t anybody else watch any (or 7) sporting events today?

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    I don’t watch much golf once baseball starts up, but the Crosby is definitely the highlight of the early part of the season so that’s about to be fired up on the DVR.

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    Love the Crosby Clambake.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
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    Jim Harbaugh and Justin Verlander among the amateurs playing on Sunday. On the pro side James Hahn, from Cal, is tied with Sneds for the lead; will he repeat last week?

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    sounds relaxing. but i wouldn’t know golf from a hole in the ground.

    ok. my work here is done.

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    asvd

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    See, stuff like this is why you’re missed when you’re gone too long.

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    [code][/code]

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    ah, memories

    Never suck on a Blow Pop with the microphone open.
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    Thing of beauty, I miss this team.

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    They were so good and so much fun!

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    I’d forgotten it was Ibanez butchering left field.

    If this is His will, He's a son of a bitch.
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    Happy New Year and Happy Pitchers and Catchers Reporting Eve! One might think it’s an auspicious year for the Diamondbacks (and for BMac’s sake I hope they win the NL West) but we know better, don’t we? Let’s shed the skin of runner-up and slither to the top!

    snake cap

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    ew ew ew.

    In play, run(s)! Talk dirty to me gamecast, talk dirty. - Nevermoor
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    This.

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    That is the single ugliest A’s hat that I have ever seen.

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    Until they introduce their ‘coonskin cap.

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